WIFTBY FREE PRESS, WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 10, 1988, PAGE 5 It is the right, nay duty, of the press to comfort the afflicted and afflict the comfortable. That, anyway, was the way it was taught to Lucas Letterpress when he was a very young and impressionable man striving to learn the craft of journalism. Now that he is the editor and property of The Beaver Flat Rail, Lucas does have more difficulty with the afflicting part than he did as a young man. Afflicting does strange things to advertisers, who, most of the time, tend to be either comfortable or are trying. to get that way. But right now, Lucas wrestles with the comforting and afflicting in an editorial he is writing. To wit: the horrors that some would impose on the auto insurance industry in this province. Standing right this very instant in front of Lucas' desk is Svelt Bellicose, a bulbous-nosed portly fellow of Falstaffian proportions, whose blood pressure, given his complexion, exceeded the August humidex reading. "Is this a free country or not?" bellos Bellicose. "No, I think not. And not one more ad will I put in your paper until you defend us editorially." He crosses his arms and stands his ground. Lucas shrugs. "Svelt," he says finally. "You never do advertise." "Then I'l continue to not do so." Lucas smirks. "Very well. And exactly what is it you want The Flat Tail to tell the world?" "How the government has no right telling the insurance industry how to run its business. We can set our own rates; it's nobody elses never-you-mind." I take it you would not favor the NDP's plans to have government take over the whole industry?" "Never! Why, let the government run it, and sure as shooting the rats will keep going up and up and up. Do you know how much it costs imsurance companies to stay in business?" "They do it for fun?" WITHOUR, FEET UP by Bill Swan Censored "Of course." "And car insurance runs a deficit?" "For sure." "Why not let the government take it over then? Who runs a deficit better than government? Why, in no time at all they'd have that deficit up there with the best of them" Bellicose snaps at flies, his mouth open, then shut, then open again as he tries to figure out what Lucas just said. He cant, and gives up. Next is Crabby Carron. Crabby has observed the No Smoking signs about The Flat Tail office, and decided on bis approach. "din sure that as a gentleman of the pres, you are jealous of the freedom bestowed on you be our founding fathers," Crabby begins. Lucas looks up. "No. What's that?" "The right to freedom of the press. The right to print what you want. The freedom to stand up for every person's right to speak freely in an open and 350 more expected m Durham French inmersion By Debbie Luchuk French immersion enrolment numbers are expected to be up by 350 students region-wide this fall, according to Barry Vail, Durham Board of Education area Conrad visits FROM PAGE 1 outside in a sleeping bag which, after 12 years, is showing signs of wear. And he relies on people he meets for food contributions and help for any problems that may arise. Dube bas had to purchase 12 new bicycles since he began his trips and during all that time, he says he bas never been robbed or threatened. One particular memory for Dube during his travels was meeting U.S. president John F. Kennedy - they met in Washington, three days before Kennedy would be assassinated in Dallas, Texas. Dube said Kennedy stopped his motorcade near Washington air- port and said he had read about Dube in one of the Washington newspapers. He then handed Dube $200 and wished him luck. Dube bas thoughts of returning to Europe but admits it will take more money than he now bas. superintendent. Figures as of last spring were 2,192 students enrolled in French immersion from kindergarten to Grade 8 in the region, 104 jn French immersion for Grade 9 and 10. lIn Whitby, there were 341 The Texaco gas station at 414 Brock St. N. was robbed of $300 while an attendant was checking transmission oil on a car. Durham Regional Police say students enrolled in the K-6 Frenca immersion program at F.M. Heard school. There were no figures available for Whitby secondary students attending a Frencb immersion progran However Vail said that some Whitby high school students Scholarship for West Lynde teacher A West Lynde public school teacher has been awafded a $1,150 scholarship by the Feder- ation of Women Teachers' Associations of Ontario. Janice Chaabane received the scholarship, the Isabel Lawson Memorial Award, to continue a special project in education. The award will be announced Aug. 16 at the federation's annual meeting in Toronto. Chaabane's project is to produce "Author Boxes" for use in the primary division. Each box will contain Big Books, sets of Little Books, blulletin board displays, records, types, filmstrips and suggested activities for child centre programs the attendant was helping a driver check his transmission oil when the passenger in the car walked into the lobby and stole the money from the, cash register. attend other schools in the region with the program. Figuresfor tbe fall will not be available until the first week of September, but Vail said, "We anticipate growth at the kindergarten level with 350 students as our annual intake." Evanshen in stable condition Canadian Football League Hall of Famer Terry Evanshen is in stable condition and out of intensive care in Oshawa General Hospital. The 44-year-old wide receiver, who played in the league for 14 years. was injured in a July 4 traffic accident in Oshawa. A Bethany, Ont. man, Daryl Pertan, has been charged by Durham Regional Police with driving through a red light. Evanshen suffered internal injuries and had his spleen removed as a result of the accident. A Montreal native, Evanshen, vice-president of operations for Micromar International of Orono, now makes his home in Brooklin. Robbers at Whitby gas station How to organize a happy marriage. Hlowto organize 23 surnmer dresses. 12 suits. 3 si Ort jackets 8 pairs of mnes shoes and a large amour: of underclothing, slacks, socks. sneaXers. scarves, and Shorts Plus 2 tennis racquets and a 5 stnng banjo with 2 strings missng' rERO.OSETFOR EULtCS. .)NOW' ON SAR. $159r rS4ACÂAÈSHELVINQ, -WEM KEHMASC ÜM 80 THICKSON RD. S. THICKSON PLACE PLAZA WHITBY 430-1636 Str Nors:Monday-Wednesday 10 6pm Thursday&Fiday9damlo9Qpm SaIturdayt9 mtto6pmF FA XFRCFlV A lLFAX t\ake the world only 15 seconds away! • Toshiba's TF 111 $1995 w/ discount coupon • Sharp Fax from $1775 • Reconditioned machines from $1500 • Sales and Service provided for ail makes and models • Paper at discount prices 430-0004 democratic society." "Sounds good so far. Go on." "Do you realize that curtailment of the freedom is costing you thousands of dollars each year?" "Thousands?" "And that's pure profit which could go directly into your pockets. Your profits, Mr. Letterpress." Lucas stands up to his full height of four feet ten. No one notices. . "But because the government has decided to limit freedom of expression," Crabby continues, "then the whole tobacco industry is faced with severe restrictions on its advertising. Now that might seem like a just cause to some. But think who's next? What industry will face govemment censorship next?" "I dunno," Lucas replies. "The brewers? The liquor industry?" "You're a rotten commie, that's what you are!" "Or maybe the government will just let the tobacco and alcohol industries pay for all the health care costs they cause. Say that's an idea. We could legalize drugs the same way." "You're a loony, you know that?" "Next you're gonna tell me that advertising doesn't create new smokers; it just helps Company A increase its market share." "Exactly!" "Then you're saying advertising doesn't work." "Well, in a manner of speaking." "Please," says Lucas, "don't let the truth get out. This paper runs on advertising. If anyone finds out it doesn't work, why, I'm finished." "But American cigarettes won't suffer the same ban!" "Somebody'll figure it out. Now git." Lucas sits down, poises his hands over the keyboard of his computer and writes: "The role of the press is to comfort the afflicted and to afflict the comfortable. . .