KALNINS ON*. .. JOE'S FAREWELL A year ago I met a shaggy-looking Englishman, named Andrew Joseph Hilton Fisher, commonly known as Joe Fisher who later became an ace reporter for The Toronto Sun............... It just happened so that we both ended up in Toronto's better-known body rub parlors. Joe posed as a dumb-dumb customer off the street in order to get material for his story on sprawling massage parlors; 1, at the same time, masquaraded as an out-of-town ama- teur photographer for the pictures I was asked to provide on this highly intriguing subject. The end re- sult, needless to say, was short of spectacular: I got my bare-bosom pictures (and extras!) and Joe produced yarns of sizzling stories a la News of the World about luscious broads, often rubbing the customers in the wrong places. I'm still wondering, how come the sex kittens didn't gang up on him after all that dirt and smut splashed across front pages of the Toronto Sun. This week, i was sad to learn, my old pal Joe (he's only 26) is packing his bags and heading home (to England) particularly at the time when Canadian journ- alism is in dire need of flamboyant characters like him. Moreover, Joe Fisher, the roving reporter had a way with words. An outwardly insignificant item he could turn into an earth-shaking news event. A rare journa- listic quality indeed nowadays. Nevertheless, he told me, he's going back to Birmingham, Midlands, and will start working on a book. I suspect this was just an excuse, perhaps, for bigger and better things to come. In recognition of the many contributions Joe has made while writing for the Sun, an impromptu farewell party was hastily arranged in Spadina House, known also as the local watering hole. Basically, I hate farewell parties, along with retirement dinners and gold-watch presentations. It's like attending your own funeral procession in a distant future. But, Joe's "farewell to Whitby TMCA GOLF COURSE: Instruction for beginners & ad- vanced beginners under outstanding leadership. Dates to be announced. MEN'S FITNESS: Two nights a week at Henry St. High starting Jan. 7 & 10. Exercixe & recreation. excellent leadership. WOMEN'S FITNESS: An evening of fun in condition- ing including basketball, volleyball, badminton, etc. from 7:30 - 9:00 p.m. Tuesdays at Henry High. Starting January 8th. CROCHET WITH US: Co-sponsored with the Whitby Library. Beginners starts Jan. 12th from 7:00 - 9:00 p.m. Maximum registration 15 per class. Pre- registration required. 2 classes being offered. Advanced WHITBY Sun" party (a better word for it is BASH) was somewhat different in context. The turn out (you guessed it) was was impressive. Almost 80 percent of the editorial staff showed up to bid farewell to Joe. Darft beer flowed freely. Even an ail garbed-up stripper surfaced with her customary assests-bumps and grinds. As the evening progressed, the noise level shot up by several hundred decibles. At one point, no one was paying any atten- tion to the red-coated waiter, staggering with beer ord- ers ail over the place. Worse, he couldn't find very many financial backers for the drinks that had been ordered. Many Sun staffers dug into their empty pock- ets, thus worsening the already poverty-line monetary, situation. The waiter was about to scream for help, but ail the banks (I gather) had already been closed by that time. Veteran news hound Bob MacDonald wish- fully observed: "It looks as though they don't want us to get stoned". Meanwhile, Joe Fisher was clutching his Sun gift, a pewter mug, nicely engraved and radiating a seductive light even in the darkest corner of the Cabana Lounge, Then, he passed the mug around. By the time it reach- ed my thirsty throat, the beer had gone. I could only smack my lips in thirst, like a kid who's been bypassed I by an ice cream man. Though, I must admit, that an hour later I finally quenched my thirst from Joe's pewter mug. Over came the hero himself, grinning, laughing and cajoling. "Weil, Alex ..... thanks for coming over," he said pumping my hand. "Please, don't forget to send your column." How can I forget after such a memorable evening? It~M WE'V E CIANGED- ow ABOUT CROO'0 NEWS TEN MINUTES SOONER dial I 14 CHOO The Bright and Lively Town & Country Sound ANNOUNOINO STEREO "STUDIO ROOM 118" Featuring Panasonic technics - Electrohome and Fisher Lines of components WE ALSO CARRY - Garrard - Elac and P.E. turntables Panasonic - Fisher - Sonna - and Electrohome Speakers WATTS RECORD MAINTENANCE Butt Radio and Appliances 118 Brock Street South Whitby 668-3707 Il FREE PRESS, THURSDAY, DECEMBER 13, 1973, PAGE 7 Crochet begins April 4th. A six week course.' Two classes, one in lacing, one in yarn. A PEAK AT THE PAST: The purpose of the course is to basically stimulate an interest in collectables and give a general knowledge of glass, pottery, silver, furn- iture, real or reproduction. Course to be held Monday evenings. Co-sponsored with the Whitby Library. 6 week course. AUTO MECHANICS: Held at Henry St. High Auto Shop on Wednesday evenings. Classes for beginners and intermediates. Starts Jan. 9th. WINE MAKING: Those interested please phone the Whitby YMCA. OK! I'LL DO IT MYSELF: Make it a New Year's resolution to learn how to do it yourself. Learn the basic skills to make repairs around the house. Become familiar with the tools required. Save time, aggravation and perhaps reduce repair bills. 7:00 - 9:00 Monday evenings starting Jan. 19th. Pre-registration required by Jan. 11th. SEWING: Wednesday evenings. All aspects of sewing taught. Pre-registration required by Jan. 9th. Class starts Jan. 16th. CRAFTS FOR WOMEN: A variety of crafts for women on Mondays 1:30 - 3:30 p.m. Instructed by Dianne Lightle, plus a nursery program for 2 - 5 year olds, co-ordinated by Eleanor Holman, to be held at Brooklin United Church. Pre-registration is required by Jan. 7th. Course planned to start Jan. 14th. 15 people required for the class. LET'S CREATE TOGETHER: A course for mothers and pre-schoolers (2 - 5 yrs.) designed to foster com- munication and understanding between mother and child and to assist mothers in directing the child's crea- tive development. Classes held at St. John's church on Tuesday mornings beginning Jan. 8th and Brooklin United Church on Friday mornings beginning Jan. I lth. Pre-registration at the Y office by Jan. 4th. LADIES-TAKE-A-BREAK: St. Mark's United Church - Special programs for housewives Wednesday mornings. 9:30 - 11:30. 12 week sessions on conditioning and interesting topics plus a pre-school nursery program for mothers taking the course at a very reasonable rate. Begins Jan. 9th. Westminster United Church - is conducted as above for ladies and pre-school children of the corridor area. Conditioning classes, coffee break and special topics make an enjoyable program. Brooklin United Church - as above for the ladies and children of the Brooklin area. Starts Jan. 9th. - - - mmmwlmlmo