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We did M, joriiiiViiiiriirLd Be to soundly sleep. Memories of a near, thee heads. a -- - _, ...V w... mils mu anuy mu wallets on, “Did we have to go through all that just so I'd have an easy column next week?" I asked Beth on the way home. Later that night. as we tucked the two little guys in bed, my perspective mellowed, however. By that time, Drew had spit out most of the sand in his mouth, and Jordan, in his nighttime soft voice, thanked us for the "funny time at the beach. But Daddy, we left our queen in her castle." We did M, Jordan, we did so And Beth and I left our two lungs m mnnd'u an“... M.--:, _, _ ,, n . A drone: Just ot' wmd ,andh,lasts our sxte We look war at Drew 4nd mu can t we the peanut butter orJam for the sand A real sand wwh And then. the minutes of utter chaos Wasps :nvrlde.d1vetbomhxng1nJordan‘s orange pop Seagulls arrive on muse I put our pop back tn the bag so the wasps wouldn't get :1 l lunge for Drew. who's buryung my watch m the sand, I hn the bag, spllllng the pop Beth peels apples for the luds Drew takes hm. and immediately mes to stand up, leaving himselfa Fistful ofsandapple. He follows up with a blood curdlmg scream A seagull takes iltght three centimetres from Jordan. He follows up With a blood curdhng scream I take Jordan and Drew down to the water. where we rind the surfers are sitting this one out, Too nsky We build a sand castle, safely away from the crashing water Oops, oh well guys. we thought we were safely away We can build another sand castle. They both follow up with blood curdling screams At which pomt. havmg determined there IS no outpatient chmes for emotionallydrained parents in Grand Bend, we do the I{tutor-til dung. Go up the main drag and shop our wallets off, .. "a ..... L-..- ._ ___- AL I .. . r _, - - Second Class Mail Regtstratiort Number 5540 Published every Wednesday by The Fturwsy Group Incorporated 215 Fairway Rd. s., Kitchener, Out. August 28,1991 PAGE . Wawrloo Chronicle Now, how difficult lg It to set up a picnic lunch for four? Ha. Guess agam The corners of the blanket keep blowmg up, I anchor each corner down Spread our cute checkered table cloth le open the lunch bag md Hi ftwk. where's ' ,1! home, rhdrftyou" -ie -- --__ N_W..r_i.. Jug- nu “A“: "" lullkll. "You get the blanket and stuff set up and I'll get the kids," offered Beth. Polterpicnic. Part 1. Arms full with blanket, lunch, beach toys, sw1m trunks and towels, I wandered down towards the water, looking for the perfect spot. Nope, too close to the water. Nope, too close to the cars Nope. too close to the change rooms. Nope, too close to the scantilyclad young women Ah, here's the perfect spot, I set up, as my family made as way towards me. Someone in our household decided a picnic at Grand Bend beach would be an excellent way to spend a day of our holidays last week And it wasn't Jordan, Drew or me, To be fair, I thought Beth's idea was a good one at the tune, too Little did I know it would end up like an Alfred Hitchcock movxe with a Stephen King spin and a dash of the Twilight Zone, After a dreary morning it cleared nicely as we zipped along the backroads and arrived at the beach Just in time for lunch, stV-___L,ce t. . - 77 i, thmg in drink for our one-year-old. Water will do Beth nd vardan scamper MT with our change to buy a couple ”(sodas at nut the whoa, what do we have here, peanut butter and ‘m undwxchrs' Welcome to our noon-hour nightmare' l. mad:- tum rolls for van ¢nd me," said Beth. f knww I'm mung one right now, but It's a httle dry tt Thu Bt mmc, the nne With no butter, first ldon 't have d drink 1d mm jmuln' mung m} sandwich Give me that - no. an fund naught. Just keep It V ' Polterpicru'c. Part Ill. N It was rumored to be a perfect day for a picnic... m) . “793° CNRONUCLE. WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 23. 1991 Jug ofJulce" You got It out of the fridge THAT’S LIFE Eu, ts-rar '-perfect picnic. ad/ii/i"; . 478 Albert St., fl Albert St., WaterIoo g . so Westmount Rdll., Waterloo