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But they are whacked up In a couple of years, and there's a lot of shoddy work- Hundreds of years ago, man lived by bread alone, a little hope, and a lot of faith. He built cathedrals. reaching toward God eagerly and artistically. When the cathedral was finished, after two or three hundred years of loving craftsmanship. it was a place to worship: physically, aesthetically and spirituality. One could almost reach up and touch the face of God. And then get about his busi- ness. Today; our banks are the cathedrals: vast ediftces of stone and steel and cohcrete. The cost of them is, proportion- ately. the same as that of the Nth centu- And man does not live by banks alone, though I know this is heresy and liable to have me investigated by the RCMP. Man does not live by bread alone, as someone once said, truly. A little butter helps; and a littlojam makes it cvert more palatable. though l'w wen the days when a chunk of German brat, "vii-smelling. sourtasting, hit my palate with the force of a piece of Black Form! Cake THIS is the shot-gun column I promised last week, and Rot so busy running down my wife I didn't gel around to it. If it wasn't for government waste and stupid expenditures for things few of us "could consider essential, we wouldn't have to tax kid's candy, personal hygiene materials and we might even afford the odd smoke or drink. Indexed pensions for MP's and civil servants, fat salaries for non-productive people in the civil service and fancy offices and perks for the same people .-. these are the things to be angry about. Do we really need a $10,000,000 jet for the premier, a multi-million dollar investment in Suncor and is it essential that we pay for King Trudeau's luxurious lifestyle. Second Class Nail Restitution Numb" an The real pr'oblem isn't in how funds are raised by the tax people but how money is squandered by both the federal and provincial government. There's a limit to how much tax you can put on booze and tobacco and children now have to cough up extra pennies for their periodical fill of candy. Corporations aren't able to do much more than they are already, OHIP premiums have already been hiked to the point where they are getting hard to digest. She could probably win her ease and prove that such things are essential. But the fact of.the matter is that it really doesn't matter. Surely once the money-is committed -it really doesn't matter a whole lot where it comes from to pay the bill. This protest, as is the case in so many public protests, attacks the symptom and ignores the root problem. A woman in Waterloo is leading a protest against Queen's Park because Treasurer Frank Miller has deemed matters of, personal hygiene to be non-essential and therefore taxable. PAGE tt Waterloo woman's protest misdirected - mango cungmcg Iegutrattoet Number but established 1854 published every Wednesday by Fairway Press. a division of Kitchener-Waterloo Record Ltd., owner Wateetoocttroetetert_t-toottmtttoorottttooet Soc-rum wowumm "amtetgrmmmtbrwortot-ootrmsaro Open Mondaylo may .ottam to imam . Time' to take aim address correspondence to Waterloo office: " Kim: SLSouth. Waterloo, Ont., telephone “3430 AWElLNESDAY. 225 Fairway Rd.S., Kitchener. Ont. Then one asks for the Key to the Kingdom. It is produced. with celerity," and one is ushered into the secret place. where one of the lesser tests turns a key, one takes one’s l'iul2, goes into a little cubby-hoie, and worship: Munmon. by counting one's investments, all pieces of paper. " If one is very rich, or very poor, one is ushered into the cell of one of the higher priests: the loans m_anager, or the General Manager. In the first cell one is told that one can easily get more green paper If one assigns one grandmother, two legs and an arm as security. In the cell of the high priest, one is told that the sky is the limit. that the high priest is merely there to smooth. or unctuate, one into the realms of even greater material wealth, and that one is the salt of the earth, to say the very least. When they are finished, they are also a place to worship. But one doesn't light a candle. One hands over a little book, or a piece of paper, to one of the lower priests, who hands back some green or blue paper. One makes an obeisance, and is rewarded with a hearty, "Have a nice day." manship, because they are not expected to last for a thousand years - maybe 40. JUNE 2, tiNt2 Publisher: Manager: Editor: Paul Winkler Bill Karges Karla Wheeler Or one goes to the High Priest. who is genial, jovial. and offers a return on one's money which is one-quarter per cent lower than the cathedral down the street. or across the corner. (These cathedrals tend to bunch up on corners.) But there's always a catch. in the small print. _ One leaves the cathedral physically, atestheticafly, and spiritually impo» verlshed. One is apt to head tor the liquor store. Here's another, from NA. Ronls, of Thunder Bay: "Dear Mr. Smiley: Your columns are always Interesting if some- times a trifle vulgar. They are always forthright and subjectively honest and I enjoy reading them." Thanks. NA. item three] I have to decide to live with my tour-ttmes-broken nose, or have a nose Well. that's only item one of my shot-gun column. though It grew to the length of an old Sharps buffalo gun. Physical? One stands in a line-up of sweaty strangers, everyone looking grouchy. the proceeds. by lurches and ambles, to the lower priest, and figurar tively bows (though they are a damn nice bunch of girrpriests, in my opinion). One is then referred to the next higher priest, who is unetuous, smiling. and as hard as nails if one wants some mortgage money, or some cash to feed the hogs. BILL SMILEY Item an, My daughter is irroke. and my kid brother ls almost rich, and they're too young to be married, so what do I do, Who pays the piper? Guess. The goverTr ment has no money. You and l have] little. And the little has become a littler, We'll soon be at littlest. It's not the proper comparison of a verb. but " works, It should be: little, less, least.) Item five. The Feds. in their wisdom. have driven the oil industry out of Canada, Alsnnds has become Nosands. In Ontario, the memment. without a by-your-leave, bought into Suncor. and an analysis has showed that they paid more than $300 million too much for it. - job. Saw the nose man this week. He said. “if you can live with it, OK. if you can't, I'll fix it," and his eyes gleamed sadisti- cally, lean't live with it, and I'm scared of the operation. Item four. My wife wants to “Have a talk." That means she wants me to give up all my bad habits and not give up any of hers. This usually arrives at a stalemate. When I get dinner, the kitchen looks like an lrishman's shanty, with everything dirty and everthing scanty. When she does, it looks like a hospital room - anemic. asceptic. and as though we hadn't eaten. And I'm never sure we have.