Waterloo Public Library Digital Collections

Waterloo Chronicle (Waterloo, On1868), 29 Jan 1975, p. 13

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It ay began with some friends of our: who like to play-with words and create wild puns. They had a bit of a problem and one said to the other: "We seem to be in dire straits." The other replied solemnly; "Yes, Dire Straits separ- ate Tierra Del Freakout from the Cape of Good Dope, I believe." _ All you need is a knowledge of geographical terms and a total inability to blush at the atrocious puns you pro- duce. Came across a new. party game recently. and thought yoga might like to try it oeryottr guests. _ Or something like that. And they were off. They tried it on some of their friends, and the result was a collec- tion of puns that even Shakespeare would have blushed at. Some of your friends will undoubtedly try, if I know people, to turn it into a pornographic geographic game. This is almost unavoidable, because there are a lot of people with dirty minds, unlike you and me. _ These excrescences on the (ace of our pure and bland society will come up with tilthies like Sunapha Beach, the State of Nymphomania in which we find a mountain called Mons Pubis and a wood labelled Shewor Forest. Pay no attention to them '. _ They'll suffer enough‘ln the next world for contriving such monstrosities as Taka Peak, ltsa Butte, Para Buttes and Maka Pass. Oh, they'll suffer. - But not as much as 'you'll suffer when your guests get into the swing of things, and start producing such items as Melon Coulee and Sherbet Shore. mm (t9Y Perhaps what you should do is partition your guests into groups, give each group a geographical term, and see what happens. - - _ Thusfyou might say to one group: "O.K., your topic is b'ays. Let's hear some bays." So you get such items as Hound-dog Bay, and Stagat Bay and Brought To, Bay. - Live R. At the basis of 'iiiii/iiitiy i'iitiiirYs Font 9“ Life, end running on trout we luau- ..vc. an: Minna Bills. In there somewhere you will find Compression Springs. _ To another group, yois submit streams, and they supply such doozers as Uptha Creek, Niktha Creek and Sle’au Burn. If there's an alcy in the crowd, he might suggest Don't go away," it gets worse. In front of me I have a map, showing this unusual world, drawn by an excellent cartoonist who became involved. On that map is an island called Nomanison Island (the poet Donne). on which is a lighthouse called Gotta Light and a cape called Cape Waukin. All we need is a Bull- fighter'sCape. . Someone drew cities, so that on the map we have Greater Kappa City and, in small print Lesser Kappa City. In these 'cities may be found such things as the Pubic Library; Brut Al Copse la small wooded area), and a narrow street labelled Gunman‘s Mall. On the map is a kingdom called Kingdom of Kum (ruled by King Klimact Eric) and above that is a smaller adjunct called Higher In Kum, and below it another called Lower In Kum. _ _ TLili 6f! tie State of Nymphomania lies Kumin Sea, in which are found a Fast Eddy and a CurrtTfof ants. _ w"" Then there are the gneat blank spaces on the map. One is entitled Ara Plain, and the other Just Deserts. --" _ -- Giriheris are hills and mountains. We have Kitchen Range, Ova_tha Hill and Duly Cols.. . . "NB’r’is' mining left out. There is an ancient mine, begun by the Incas. called .Old Pala Mine. Another, Owtafya Mine. "There are huge forests dubbed I Never Wood, and Yew Wood, and She Wood, and He Wood, and of course, the biggestof all.Y‘allWood. _ __ "e-. . Point A Forder. i , , “I. MW (ti3) SCH EN DEL t,'ioTj-,)i,iii2-,r'v4ii:',',v,,j no KM SWEET MUN, WATERkOO - srlt-Mttt OFFICE mm a. SUPPLIESOSTATIONERYOGIFT rare are' points, succinctly titled Getthe Point and Schendel's sanction ot lamps was specially selected to offer best reading conditions tor varying surroundings. So you can be assured that any lamp you purchase is quality de- signed. Like our College Study Ltrmps, at $32.96. Or our Tensor HMrttertsity lamps from $15.95. See them all. at Schendel‘s. ' Suite! 3 Noutl'It paint . - straighter - - There are dangerous, dirtygreat took: looming just off Dire Straits. They “fearsome to tailors, and no wonder. They areknown " Acif Rock andC.ountry Rock. .. _ Sound, another Saten Sound. - There are a couple of depressions. or faults. in the map. One of these is Kronic Depression, the other is ltzer Fault. There' are elevated coast . lines. These are dubbed Base Cliffs, Treble Cliffs, and the High Coast of Living. Got the 'iiii7hirii"i;iii". TiG'aiarracir 133111 in twenty minutes. But don't let them. pawn off on you such junk as Generation Gap, Parr Gulf, and Cape Porn. A fire last Wednesday night at K-W Meat Pack- ers, 9) Bridgeport Rd. E.. Waterloo degtroyed an es- timated $2,000 worth of meat. '3,000 fire destroYs ' meat . - It wasn't possible to de- termine whether the fire which began in one of the company smokehouses was due to ,overheating or to meat falling on to smoulder- ing sawdust. ' As well as the loss of 150 slabs * bacon and 300 pounds of sausage there was about $1,000 damage to the building. The estimated loss was a.company estimate accord- ing to Waterloo Fire Chief John Staller. k 1.1 m. Ge called Mersey Assorted candies. copper and brassware, leather goods. 'bassware and crystal, souvenirs, jeweilery, watches and many other items. 20-50% off . . ART & JEWEL SHOP ghatashita 'teeht-r-rr-i.ttt-.to-atscaro-r KING’S his?) - "tttttnan. momma.” - 12-Jun-99 “10:“ up. 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