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 «Wk f^ OLD SIOHE OALF. -,ia gicox If »rrl»r» Im the k nssn » dreamy air ipread irtl"id each of uiiat Idly rtU«y- jjlm te â- peak even. San- l^b liinli* **/r"^n. had •trelled te a ragged J «verleeked the plain, and be- ""uBteepwall. We watched «a one win watoh a fly going »r ep«ratlon. At length he .ammiti, itood there, and dl- r** inak eff to the wert, then oom- fil*« " desoent What could H ' v3e cime. hit lerape atream- Thim en the wind. ,_,H%never ^thliteppod In the mld»'i of ui. sf « 'JSr-lots, let. I jmnl" "^I^Z f^et. and Gaw started *. before gaining it, however, yjj^jflflog which be rEBlHD BiCK TO CAMP, what might be their errand. 'k.'sre W9 oonld h»ndle enr arms 'fupenttegreund, a great mau • 'jjie foreaofit ef whom drew op *r !ed tnbsa of our rlflaa, while •__5fant t"'k ' .-French Jje commenced a par- ..h ended In a small party cf the joea bsing admitted te camp, the entaide Its limits, thengh Lf MCef " i ' " C9unoll Taeae a It vild Indians I had seen, and " 1, held me spjeohleai with wen- kttrlfc9, v,jir..., J -eJ" I whispered, 5 oBX and some Cheyennes that *C»^ wi: Kled man isthefamona 'â- ^hll'f, .OdS:oneC;lf.'" u. for Sionx Is the drawing of 1 held edgewise, aoresa the throat felt my fieih creep when a brave in reply t9 some question of tmiled pleaiantiy, drew hla hand ACSOSS HIS THROAT, 1 ,»e hi« bUnket a Jwing, and lat ' I i'.tc sat down. I did not really t« it all perhaps It was becaoae I •Mn"cued ettt' 'Ing, I might soon i^f:i,iah(ad. B -ought at lass face wlta the race of men ef all others iHtred te knew the realfzjbtien leemsd to equal the pleasures of bitlen in a presence which made me and yet I could no mere have 1 iw»y irem that circle than have the air. Both parties carried »i fer, thengh the cumbrous lances friei had been laid aside, mere than ene ^bltded knife 30n'd be seen beneath the ihirt er bcfiile robe, all ready to Ih and r'rink seme life, iStons CUf" kt uia Isng eyes roam ttea »3ttle en my faci, with a look Jf meant te be reassuring, made me In a few moments he would ba mas- ks; character and all my thoughts as Jltieemed te eay " Zouâ€" poor boy 1" na, from my apparent disappointment, Vdown drepping of the month corners I part, and A HORRIBLE SHILS n; te be enoenrsging " Never mind 1 fnn for chief heap fun fer squaw â€" I' leap 1" ^nin I tried te bring seme power te my the hiitory and appearance of that I ciicle made me feel a pigmy among The Indians saw It also elated npuied among them at this silent tri- I to their power. So we sat, and the -that ef tener token of red war than fertn and silently passed Te me enoh movement and gesture elndiaBswaB significant their manner Riding the item of the pipe while the id iipa olesed ever the menthpleoe, apan each side a small orifice igh which the blue smoke streamed up- 'i twa tbim columns the manage- ' the blanket their gestures wUle vhicfa, with the bef.y's inolinatien, i;ed perfectly the meaning ef the gut- pMquake and the Telegraph Opaia- tors pmwaa a thrilling time up In the opera- mm of the Western Union when the Pq3»ke rheck was felt. Nearly a hun- Nerators tat there, each connected as P'netvewlth different placts in the W. There were men en the Baltimore fi» the Louisville, en the Savannah, |^« UarkstGn, There was net a man I' "°'n who did not have an experience L^'v°j*' ^i^other. An acquaintance if ^•'Iti'iure where the sheck was ""ively, Tue fellow at the other "^u spiani.-.g along when "break" « ihere i^a? a scrt ef dull rattle at f" ^^ 'i^tn eilenoe. In a minuta the "-srefeUw said that there was a panic r««P«rat!ng room, and that all the men kh..' â- '"â- -'"â-  â-  '^^' Savannaii wire was Fs t V'x^" without the preliminary I; V,! 1 ^^^^^ ^«-e three minutes of t:,f°:'°tbe Chioogo cffi.e. Then a r 8 mteicnange of €jpsrJi:QceB, A thoa- ft,J«"lh"» fromKow Clears to Chi •^f'i°'°New Y^ikto San Francisco kthll. v,*^ ^*y '^Slcg to find out what Y«i«hcublewlth their fellows In the r' LsuiBvllle firjally struggled back to it?t'^Qteld in a frightened way nT/k .r.,°*^" shaken up and had fled ^ebniWhg, Tae chief operator at Pftst tl,- J ®"y '°'*° who had stuck te CJJ"ied te give the hundred different •rwS^ " '=*"'«! Charleeten that Nl» K. *â- * "Jddenly cut eft, had »p- pyy been .wallowed up. W L.*® me," said my friend, who 1^ workiog the Baltimore wire that IHble. T ""'s^edy had jastled against 'trL\T*'°°* "otU everybody was 'W, THE BSAYE AID BBUTAL GOWBOT. â-²m lBcl««t • TrsaxU mqswtte-McMlc BargeiT mmM. lm«i •n Austrian sergeant te a new Ane man blushed deeply and re- -.«. ik ^a medal our oew wen at J. •"•hsw," iepUjy »» not always the tenderesli, ifsfiT?'" There b the red game -^U, "^*»nce he wlU fight a bird of k^ ^gbt. but he oats np tengh in Bat tha oewboy, while pMMtsIng t« a great extent many ef the oharaotaristlci of both sailer and golde, la even beyond them oenapicaeoa fer hla aenaltlve pride, his ai- moat aggreaaive apbit of Independence, hla bright Intelligenoe and hie iportamanlike iaadaota, says a writer. Saoh at least are the beat ef them. The oiinglng aervility bern ef oentarlea e( strongly marked olaaa diatinotlon, the low conning ef the gatter- bred aoom of oitlea, the neavy. boerlah atupidity ef the peasantry of ear older olvi- ll2«tiona, are unknown among the f rep- bern oltizena ef the weatern atataa ef America. i the ether hand, ear oewbey la aheoking- ly cruel, haatytn temper, and anbrldled In tongne. In the brandbig-pen, and with a half- broken, tired, er unwilliog orae, he la a perfect fiend; hla contempt for life tee often leads te needleaa bloedahed and he ia nntlring aa an Indian in pursuit of re- venfie. With him it ia frequently net a word and a blow but a word and a bullet. The KTIQCETTE OF FBAIB1B Lira, which, heaven knows, ia in meat reapeota not very exacting, absolutely ferbitis the employment et a certain form of imp eca- tlon, which, while calling down D^ine paniahment en the person* addreased, oaata an unwarremtable imput:ttion en the oharao- ter of hla immediate female ancestor., Tde use ef anch an expreaaien ia immediately f eiiewed by the preductien of aix-aheotera ' outtera," aa they are often called), and the death of one or the ether ef the partiea te the dlapntea. O le auch incident occurred during the general round-up. Two of enr number, ene ef whom, a man of morose and aurly disposition, had lately joined as from a strange outfit, disputed abeut seme thor- oughly trivial matter. The quarrel waxed warm and at last the forbidden expreaaien was used against the stranger. Both men were en horseback, but unarmed, but Im- mediately dashed toward the wagons in which they had left their reapeotive wea- pons. The insulted man, aa he paaaed, anatched cut of ita open soabbard the six- shooter of a looker- en, tnrned hla herae, and rnahed after the enemy. Ha came ap on him aa he waa on the point ef aeonrlng hla " cutter," and without another word SHOT HIM DEAD. That afternoon he fled, and we baried the dead man where he fell, There were few to pisy him. He had entered Into the quar- rel with hla eyea open, had himself provok- ed the risk, and had paid the terrible pen- alty of hla raahneas. It was net fer na te try hia alayer. Yengeanoe might overtake him sooner or later if the dead man'a f rienda or relatione oeuld lay their handa en him, but it weald be difficukt to find the murderer. I had provided myaelf with a aelt-ceoking aix-aheotcr, similar te onr own army revol- ver. Thia la a moat dangeroua weapon, and is rarely used by western men, whose ex- perience In the nseeftbe revolver la nn- equaled. The denole action threwa the wea- pon eff Ita mark, and during momenta of ex- oitemenS one Is apt to let It eff unwittingly. This actually occurred to me mere than ence, and I reaelved to get rid ef the "peaky thing " I "traded " it with ene of the beya fer a very eld aingle-actien Oolt pattern weapon, and threw a oeuple ef hundred cartridgea into the bargain. One merning we HBAKD A PISTOL BSFOST. oloae te the wagon, and, knowing that the beya were hunting tntkey, we already look- ed forward to a good breiUifaat. Preaently my friend with the aeU-oooker rede ap tor* keyleaa. After quietly unaaddllng hla pony he proceeded te whittle a twig. ThIa dene he bared hia leg, and we then fer the first time became aware that he waa badly wounded In the thigh. A bullet had gene clean through the flaahy part and had made a wound at leaat fear inobea In depth, the upper part of which waa very much powder- burnt. He new produced hia twig, and, having wrapped a piece ef rag round It, coolly ran it te and fro te dean out the powder He muat have endured terturea, for hla face paled and ieada of perapiratlon atood en his forehead, but the brave bey never winced, and we gathered from a long string of eatha directed at the pistol and at hii pony that he was following a turkey, self cocker In iiand and finger on trigger, when his herae atumbled be insiinotlTely (aa the rider deea on such oocaslens) THBEW HIHSBLF BACK and tightened hla handa, with the above re- sult. That day he rode thirty miles to the nearest military station for a surgeon, with the wounded leg tlirowa aoreaa the hera ef the saddle. Oi another occasion we were whiling away the time hunting tquinela, fer which purpose one ef the bays had taken hla beota off and climbed a tree. Tne reat ef ua re- mained below, and were taking pet-ahota at the squirrel as it leaped from bough te bough. The climber chased the little crea- ture te the end of a thick bough, himaelf crawling along It, when, by aeme mlaadven- tore, he was atruok In the big toe by a bnl let but we none of us knew thia until, af- ter coming down, he quietly mentioned that he " reckoned he'd left a bit ef his toe up that ar tree." It waa only a small bitof the end, it ia trae but I thought that if the aame accident had happened to myself I ahenld have given tongue pretty freely. But these fellowa are inured te hardahip and Buffering, and take it aa it oemea, wlthent a word ef complaint. A Trastworthy AiuHial- Liveryman (te onatomer) " There, air. ia 'eokly aa good a boaa aa ever palled a waggin. An' yea needn't be afraid ef him he'a pnff safe an' reliable. Coitomer (eyeing the animal dnbleoaly) â€" •• I don't knew 'beat that. I'd hate to trait him with any oata." /- A Safe Oonclosion* •« BiJi Jove, Charley," aaid a yeung man at a ball, " Mlaa S aaked me If I wouldn't tie kind enough te bring her some oefiae, and, den't ye knew, we've noTer beei in- tn^aoed. What de yea thmk ..I that. eh ' • What de I think ef it T' replied Ghar- lay, •' Why, I think ahe miateek yea fer ene ef the wiyMere." FABALTZ6D BT EMOTIOV. A Man'a Kntif e Migkt U4» Ma«e Caelew by Hla Beetec an KKetUnc Beene. Themaa L Lavlna, reller at t^ Sdar Iron Werka, Pittabarg. ia lying at hie heme, with hia entire right me and ilmbaparalyi- ed. He waa well and itreng np to Satur- day night lait, when he went te aee the. play at Harrla' Moaenm. After ene ef the emetfenal aoenea, by whioh he waa atrengly affected, Mr. i.avine experienced a peonliar senaatien in hia head and a namb feeling in hia right leg and arma, AS IP THBT WBBB " SLBBFISO " He had been aitting with hia legaoreaaed and looked in the rnnga of the chafar, watoh- ing the ataga intently, and when the din!- neea affdoted iiia head he attempted to get op and go out. But when he waa in the act ef aetting his right feet down it dropped helplessly te the floor, aa if it had been a wooden limb. He than nuwle a motion te atrike or pinch the leg, thinUng it waa only temperarily benumbM by the peritien In whioh he had been aittiag. Bat to hia anr- priae he found that hia right arm waaalae paralysed and hniu helpleaaly at hia aide. He became alarmed. and aaid te Ida oompan- lon " John, there ia aemethiag coming over me and I oannet tell what it ia help me te •• GST OUT TO THE AXE " The cempanloa and another man oarried the helpleaa sufferer from the heuae and te a atreet oar, by whioh he waa taken heme. When he reached hla home ha waa anable te make the alighteat movement with hia right limba, and the entire aide of hia body waa devoid of feeling. No amount ef rubbing, pinching or pricking with sharp Inatrnmenta made any impresaien on that SIDB OF THB BuDY AFFBOTBD. The phyaioiana who were called have been giving tiie o*ae oonatant attention ever ainoe and have aucceeded In reatering a allghtiy perceptible feeling In the leg and arm. They aay that it la a remarkable case for a atrang man in the prime ef life, and aappeae it to have been cauaed either by an nnaaaal tenaien brought to bear en hie brain by temporary excitement while feUewlng the drama, er by a violent oheok to the obotda- tion of bleed caaaed by tbe peaitfoo in whioh he had remained aitting, probably daring the whole acene er act in the play. Haryesting Snakes Mr. J. £. BJdgway ef South £-anoh, Monroe townahip, haa harveated hb crop ef rattleanakea. The other morning he went te the back part of hla farm at South Branch to aalt hb aheap, and having dene thb con- cluded he weald go farther back en the hill and plok ap a tew berries. Hia way led by a lelge of rocka and there he beheld, laz-Jy baaking In theaun'araya, animmenae family of rattleanakea. They were all lying en ene big reck,and aeemed in a torpid oenditton. A large number ef them were grouped in ene big bundle, intertwined, and the othera were lying within a few feet of them in amaller groupa. Mr. Ridgway at onoe fell back, procured a club eight or nine feet long, and went at them and aucceeded in killing evAry one. ^^ttieanakea are eerily Idlled and it waa simply a job ef peandlng them te death. They aeemed te be blind, and did net try te get away and did net ahow fight. Thb would ge to oerroberate the aayhsg that fer a time during the anmmer ratttesnakea be- come blind and are leaa dangeroaa. Moat efthe anakea were young enea and were everywhere from aix inohes te ene feet in bngth. In the entire number there were aeven large enea, and from theae Mr. Ridg- way took the rattiea. One atring of the rattiea nambera eleven, three ef them idne, one eight, and so en down. The record atanda at aeventy-five. w â€"sw â-  Improved Sailiiie; Vessels. Notwithstanding the improvement! in steam navigation, tranapertatlen by aalllng veaaeb b ae much cheaper, that new expeii- menta are being teated in wind-driven orafta. On the lakea. It haa been found eoenomlcal te aae huge grain veaaeb, thoae which ply between Coloago and Ba£Eale, carry five maata. Tbere b new building a five-maated achooner for aalt water with a carrying capacity of 3.000 tona. The oem- petition between Ruaate and America petrol- eum b making both nations de all they oan to cheapen that uaefnl and wonderful pro- duct of nature. While Americana have heretofore acnt the refined ell to the reatef the world In barrela, the Ruaalana have aent it out In bulk, makmg a large aaving thereby. Several American veeaela have been fitted np to carry eil te Europe alao in balk. Aa steam la oeatly and fire danger- ouB, It b propoaed te build a aix-maated schooner that will carry ene hundred thou- sand cans -11 eil. Mineral ell, by the way, b very cheap. At laat aoceunta, crude petroleum waa selling at sixty centa a bar- rel. Thb is a remarkable boon to the poor of all countries, who have new a brilUant bluminant cheaper than was the old taUew dip. The rancint! Dervishes of Fera. Among the curleua sighta of Conatantin- eple which nearly every traveller makea a pwint of viaiting b the eatabluhment of the Dancing Dervbhea at Fera. The building in whioh theae Dancing Derviahea perierm their religiena exercbea deea certainly net irapreaa one with any idea of aacredneaa. It haa a very common-place exterior, ^nd inaide reaemblee many liaUa" en the Con- tinent aet apart fer the exhibittena ef acre- bate and ooajurora. On the fleer ef thehall b a circular place railed eff, witli a parterre beyond, and gaUeriea above, while in a re- oeas ait the mnaiqlana, wheae dngular In- atrnmenta aend forth tiieae atrange, mene- teneuB aennda wUoh oonatitate Tarkiab moa- io. The loader or prieat atanda in tlie oen- tre of the circle, and the derviaheaâ€" about twenty In number en the eooaaiona when we have witneaaed the performanoe â€" cloth- ed in light gray fl mnel ralMa, made very full, and with grey felt hata like inverted flower-pota en tiiefar heada, and feet bare, spin round him in a kind ef waltz Tiie left appears to be kept constantly on the flier, while the right foot b paaaed round rather than ever it te effect the revelation. Eaoh man keepa hia handa eat-apcead, with hb fingera pointing te tiia groond, er f dd- ed upwarda aoreaa hta brmat, and wUria round like a apinning top, liia gamMota ex- tending alMaet horiz»tally fimn the li^. Orer the Ooeu in TwentJ~foar Hoon. They an ballding a veaae l in Pittabnrgh, whioh ie expected te reaoh New Orleani from tiiac oi^ la aa ahert a time aa it new takee te x* te OatoinnatL An eoean ah^ modeled en the aame plan weald. It b ex- pected, reach Seathampten, Engbnd, from Halifax, Neva Scetia, In twenty-fenr heart. Mr. John Deogherty, ef Meant U^ien, Penn ia the inventor of tlib marveUaa craft. Tue veaael new under oonatnictlen ia te be SS feet wtd«. 165 f et long en the water-line, and 175 or 180 feet long en deck, and will be built entirely of sreed. Ita weight without the engine will be abent forty five tone, and when it Iiaa the engine and 250 paaaengera en beard, Ita draft wHl be leaa than alx Inohae. On eaoh aide efit wHI be two folding paddlea, ainking deep into the water. The paddlea will be open when going forward, ae that they may move the largeat poaaible body ef water, but the change te the baolcward metien wUl, by the agency ef apringa oleae the paddlea and thua reduoe their reaiataaoe te a minlmam. There will alao be under the centre ei the veaael two propelling pelea, whioh are in- tended te drive the vdoael through ahoal water by atrtking the bottom ef the river. Mr. Djogherty mioalatea that hb patent will ae greatiy inoreaae the apaed ef traffii en the river, that he will be able to make the trip from Ptttaburgh te Njw Orleana and back in a week â€" the time new taken by the f aateat beata to make the round trip te Cincinnati H'a b oonfi lent that he will be able te reduoe the time eocnpied in oresaing the Atlantio by the ahorteat route, that frooB Southampton te Halifax, to twenty- four houra, and that from New York to Cal- cutta to ten daya. Sa far ateam navigation by land b much faater than ateam p^epul- aion by water bat there are aeveral pUoa- ible inventions new being teated that may make water bommanicatiai much more rapid than the awifteat tralna run by leoe- motivea. Bat what marveb are poaaible te modern acience and invention. The child U living to-day, whe will not only creaa the ooean in one third the time it new takea, but who will be able te oirjumnavlgate the glebe In an alr-veaaoL A Gieat War Impendinr. All the newa from abroad indioatea the near approach of the greatest International conflict known te hbtory. The burolng Eaatern queatton ia about te be re-opened, and Ruaata will again endeavor to drive the Turkbh Sublime Porte out ef Europe and capture Cenatantineple. Thb war if it oommenoea will probab'.y involve every con- tinental power. So far aa can be foraeen,- Ruaria'a only ally wHl be France, while Germany, AuatrU, and England will be united to beat baiok Ruaak'a advance on Conatantineple, Eigland will have hei handa full in guarding the frentiara ef Hlndeoatan from the aouthern march ef the Mutoevite aoldbra. The conflict in Central Asia will '.open by the aelge of Herat by Ruasia, For countleaa a^ea that f ortreaa haa been the obj active point of all the military powera which aimed at invad- ing what are new the Britiah E»at Indiea. It haa been looked upon aa the open door te the Peninsula, the key ef the military aituatien in Siuthern Aria. Should It fall. It will be eminena to the Brittah power in Asia. Raaala haa ene advantage ever Great Britidn In dealing with alien racea. It b able to aaalmllate with and abaerb a oen- quered people. For nearly a thouaand yeara the Ruaalan haa been ateadUy preaaing aeuthward, and aa ene race after another waa aubdued they have been incorporated into and made a part ef the R uabn people. Tab b aa true of the recent oonqueata in Central and Soathern Aoia, aa It waa when the Tartars and Coaaaoka around the Caaplan Sia aubmitted to the authority of the Czur. Eagland'a policy haa been different it haa conquered many nadena in different parte ef the earth but lias never intermarried with er treated aa cqial any aave thoae of Ita oiro Caucaalan race hence the Eagliahman In India b be- lated, and the Hindeea leek upon him aa an intruder and a uanrper. Thu b what will give Ruaala the advantage, when the fight wtkea tiiace fer the peaaeaaien ef India. â€" Demoreat^a Monthly. After Twentj-five Tears. A ahip carpenter named Dwyer b em- ployed in the New England Shipbuilding Company'a yard, Bath. He haa work id there aeme time. A day er two ago a lum- ber-laden schooner from the S jutn arrived at one of the wharia ef the company. While tbe achooner waa unloading her cargo Mr. Dwyer waa aarigned to the duty ef mark- ing the timber as it waa landed on the wharf from the achooner. While attending te that work he heard hb name called by one ef the aailera on board ef the achooner. He aaked what was wanted, and wasln- turm^d chat it was meant for a sailer en beard. The ship carpenter a short time after turned hu thoughts backward a number o! yeara, and brought to mind the appearance ef a brother wbom he had not aeon for twenty-five yeara. Could the man on the achooner, who waa named Dvyar, be hia brother I He aought the aallor, and in a brief apace of time the men were ahaking eaoh ether'a handa in a vigoroua manner. They were the leng-aeparated brethera, bath having aeoght different parta ef the globe when young. For a few yeara after they heard from one another, but correa- pondenoe finally ceaaad, and each auppoaed the ether dead. The fact ef the meeting ef the two brethera after auch a long abaence aoen be- came neiaed abeut the alupyard, and It wai talked about a great deal by the workmen. I« aeems there b aaether man in the yard named D^yer. He heard efthe meeting. The two men were aohght by him, and re- anlted in finding two brotherahe luul net Men fer a lapae ef twenty-five yeara, all three ef the brethera having become lepar- ated abeut the aame time. What aeema almoat incredible b the fact that two ef the brethera heve lieen employed In the aame ahipyard here fer aome time, and yet did not knew each ether aa brothera till after the aaDor â€" ^the third brother â€" ^made hb ap- pearance here. Ma^ fc **D3M yeur liver aot well t' aska a med- loaljenmaL We den't knew what the orillae weald aay, Imt In private raheanata II Mm a leading part. BUMMEB 8MILE3. A deae race â€" ^mban. Meet ef the time ia hel waler-Tha wadt- The latcit tale abent the aea aerpant li that lt'« a bgâ€" a ohaetnnt log. Belva Lsokweed can't aee anything wrong in her riding a Uoyde. Bat elhen may bjo The only fruit crop that did net prove a aucoeaa in the Garden ef Elen: The early pair. Toe mnohb being written abeut the Colcage Anarchhta. One line fer eaoh ef them b eneogh. An eccaaluial want of animation may be exouaed In a clergyman, whe refleota that he b only addreaaing lay figurei. Tramp " I have loot an arm, air will â€" " Paaaer-by (in great haate :) " Sorry, bat I haven't aeen anything ef II" " There b a report around. Jinks, that yon have Inherited a Unded eatate." 'It b grenndleaa, my dear fellow." The man who geea te a anmmer reaert fer change and reat, often finda that the waiter* get all the change and the landlord tiie rest. An eating-heuae keeper advertised fer " a boy te open eyatera about fifteen yeara old." An oyster ought to be able te open itself long before it reaohea Ita fif Iptuith year. • Paul," said his mamma, "will you go softly into the puler and aee if grandpa ia aeleep T ' " Yea, mamma," whiapared Paul, en hb return ' he b all aaleep but hb nose. " My good man," aaid a philanthrepbS to the street laborer, " de yen ever have cauae te grumble at your pealtien " ** No, air," waa the anawer " I took my piek at the atart." Lady (in drygoeda atere) â€" " I will look at your material for teweb." Cbrk (recent- ly tranaferred from the dreaa geeda depart- ment)â€" "Yea, ma'am; aemothlng that won't ahow dirt?' Thomas, enr Irish hostler, emphaaizsa the doctrine that herae atalb ahould have earthen fl^ora thua " A horad ahould never atand en a wooden fleer, except when he'a lying down." There are UtUe, aweet, pretty and green oaaea all the way through the deaert of life, Imt the fat man who breaks a suspender en a hot day when running to catch a train deean't think of thb. " My dear," aaid Mra. Snagga to her hua- band, " what ia a oanwd I" ' Why, a can- ard ia aemetbing ene canardly believe, ef cenrae." " 0i, te be aure I Why ooaldn't I think ef that!' " Why, Mr. Harlor, I didn't know you were baldheaded. You're awful young to be baldheaded," aaid Mrd. HIte. "Oh, I dunne. I've get a aon net ever two weeki eld whe b baldheaded." ' Father, why deea the paper speak of Mba OlevelaDd'a beeka aa ' werka V " aaked little Johnny. " Well, my aen^ if you ahould ever attempt te r^ ene you wUI find out what hard work It ia." A little chap, told by hb mother te aay hb prayera, and to aak fer what he wanted, prayed ' fer one hundred brethera and fifty abtera." The mother hurried the little aln- ner off to bed before he oeuld aay Aaien I A mlnbter made an Interndnable oall upon a lady ef hb acquaintance. Her little daughter whe waa preaent grew wearr of hboenveraatien and whiapered In an audible key " Don't he bring hta amen with hlaa, mamma?" The piraenalltlea ef Eanaaa joumalUm reached a climax laat week, when a brother heatedly adviaed a leathaeme centempsrary te keep lib ahlrt en, and aubaequenily aa- certained te hb horror that the contempor- ary was woman. Femde twin-soulâ€" " Pardon my dbhev- elled appearance Ihave but just oeme from the bath." Male twin-soulâ€"" Ah 1 yen bathe then I" Femde twin aeulâ€" " Yea^" Male twin- toulâ€"" Another habit in oem- men. Hew aweet." We aaw a farmer caught in a barbed wire fence, the ether day, confined by two prenga ao that he could net atir either way. As we aaw the rame fanner putting up the accura- ed nuiaanoe in the apring, we almply wept and paaaed by. " Jnat threw me half a dozen ef the big- gest of these trout," aaid a dtizen to the fijh deder. " Threw them " qaeried the dealer. " Yea, and then 1 11 go home and tell my wife that I caught 'em, I may be a peer fiaherman, but I'm no liar." '~~â€"*^^^â€" â-  li^Sâ€" Wâ€" â€" ^â€" 'ill â- â- â-  Elopin? Twice with the Same Man Two yeara age Miaa May C«mway waa one ef the most attractive girb In the little vil- lage of Texaa, Baltimore county. She waa not handsemo, but bright and winsome, and the country beans were dravn to her like bees to a honeysuckle. She appeared to be modest and good, and sang in the village church choir. She also taught a claw In the Sonday school, ^d It waa there she met her fate. Howard Pee, It b eald, was a teacher in the aame ached. He waa an in- duatrione man, with no bad hbalts, and until he became too fond of lib f dr fellow teacher he waa a devoted huaband. He had been married aeme yeara, and hb wife waa tsn excellent lady. The oonduot of Poe and Miaa Conway aoen became the talk ef the village, and the dbcarded wife was terribly diatreaaed. Finally, one Sunday after Boheel, the pouple diaappeared. They came te Bdtimore and put up at a hotel here. They then went te Waahingten, but in a few weeka they repented et thdr unholy love, and aought fergiveneaa of their rdativea. He waa received again by hu wife, whe forgave him and belbved him thoroughly repsntant. May waa reodved into the bosom d her father's family aa a prodigal daguhter. From that time vntU about a month i^e the exemplary conduct ef Fee and Miaa Conway allenced the tonguea ef tiie geadpa. In all that time they were never aeen in each other'a company. They bowed whtnever they met, but tliat waa all. Recentty, however, they were thrown into eaoh other'a aedety at aoverd pionloa, which Poe attend- ed without hia wife. The reault waa a re- vlvd ef the old affaotlena, which led te another depement, and the oeaple are new Uylag tegettier near York, Pa, Mra. Pee Uvea alone In Texaa, anpperted by her own exertfeaa and h«r hnaband'a father.