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v% A ^ â- B^ T T T r •5. -4 » t < •^ *â-  * •< 1^ *. X «• > V T » 'I * ^ » \ ; JUST IN FON Pro'iabl; He WUl Cavalry ' eifruit; "I don't like the look ol the horse'' head, sir." Sergeant "Oh, don't worry You'll soon get ovei that He' ' Do the Same Mother: "Johnnie, de.ir, 1 was hoping you wouI> be unselfish enough ,o give your little sistei the largest piece of candy. Why, c en tl at old hcii will give all the nicest C inties to her little chicks and takj only a tiny one ^uce in a while for herself." Johnnie (ixfter watching the old hen for a while):: "\/ell, mom. I'd do the sami thing if it was worms. ' - Dog Collector "What scrt of a dog is he?" "An entomologist." "But an enttmologi'i is a collec- Iter of insects." "Well, he aoea tha. all right." Hard Timet These sausages you sent me are neat at oi end and breadcrumbs at the other," said Mrs. Andrews. "Yes, r adam," replitu the but- cher; "in these harf' times it is difficult to make both -ends meat." Anything New A business man was upset be- cause his new typist was late. Fum- ing, he said, as she finally came in: "You should have been here at nine I" "Why?" she asked, pened?" 'What hap- Could be Managed "Oh, porter," exclaimed the fair young thing, "does this train go first or the one on Platform Number Four?" "Number Four, miss," replied the porter; "it's due off in a minute, but if you run you'll catch it." "Yes; but have I got time to run over there and miss it. and then come' back and catch this one?" Boring "I'm going to kiss you before I go," said the young man who had outstayed his welcome. "Do it now while I'm still young," replied the girl, wearily. In For Awhile Just ifter his convictiuii the prisoner put up a trong plea fcr mercy. "So you can see, you"- honor, he ended, with a whine, "I'm really down and out." But the judge had heard that •tory so often before. Looking over his spectacles, he replied: "No, you may be down, but you're not outâ€" not for six months any way." He Was First Burglar (pointing to a well- known millionaire): "How would you like to be in his shoes?" Second Burglar: "1 am." THIS CURIOUS WORLD By WilliaiB Ferguson A Meddler The minister i the Highland hamlet had no more ardent admirer than old Jean. As he thundered forth denunciations of the sins of immorality, lying, drunkenness, her amens were heartfelt. One day he turned his attention to a habit of pipe smoking among the elder women. Old Jean left tht meeting firmly clutching her pipe. "I can't do with preachers when meddling," she said. meddling," she aisd. Then Choose A shipwrecked sailoi who hati spent five /ears on a dtsert island, was overjoyed one day to see a ship drop anchor in the bay. A •mall boat cane ashore and an of- ficer ha deu the sailer a bundle ol newspaper.- "The captain suggests," he toJd the .sailo. , "that vou read what's (oing on in the world and then let us know it von wan. to be res- cued." World's Shortest Novel The following, taken from a petty cashbook, is surely the world's shortest novel: â€" Advert, for typist, 2s: typist's salary, £2; flowers. 5s, chocolates, 7s6d; typist's salary, £3; sweets for wife, 6d; Winnie's salary, £<; dinner and th«ater for Winnie and self, £lO 10s; fur coat for wife, £l50: advt. for male typist, Ss. Evt»ything Froien A sailor on leave was being pressed for stories, and at last he told his â-  eners of an adventure in the icy north. "It was that cold up there," he said "that one day I saw some sea birds sus ended in midair, frozen •tiff «nd unable to fly or fall , down.'" Said one doulitiiij.; riuiiii;i>. "hut what about the law of gravity?" "That was fro ni •-ti f too," said the sailor. HAVE DIED FROM AUTO.MOBILE ACCIDENTS IN THE U.S. 5INCE. ie33 THAN WERE KILLED C«. Died cf wounds in all the wars the us. has kaj&ht. Amiwrr to PT«vrouM Puxzl^ U. S. Navy Air Unit HORIZONTAL 1 Depicted is Insigne of Squadron 33, U. S. naval aviation 7 Its are always ready for action 13 Rounded 14 Perish 15 Dry 16 Carry (coU.) 19 Lath 20 Jump on one foot 21 Anesthetics 23 German river 24 Possess 26 Sailor 28 Helped 30 Stair part 33 Symbol for samarium 34 Morindin dye 35 Part of "be" 36 Rough lava 37 Extra 39 Birds' homes 41 Essence (ab.) 42 Obtain 43 'Vehicle 45 Rare 50 'Winglike part 53 Operatic solo 55 Type of molding 56 In bed 57 Finisl>;ng tool 59 Dangled 61 King's home 62 Victims of leprosy VER'nCAL 1 Chief god of Memphis 2 Aircraft 3 Camera stand 4 Crimson 5 Overtime (ab.) 6 Native of Latvia 7 Equal 21 'Without end 22 Unusual 25 Has on 8 Nine (Roman) 27 Girl's name 9 Lord Privy Seal (ab.) 10 Lubricators 1 1 English street car l5 Hardens 17 Exclamation IS Symbol for tellurium 28 Onager 29 Little demon 31 Dine 32 Abyssini;in prince 38 Antenna 40 Horse barn 43 Fish 44 Space 46 Center 47 Symbol for silver 48 Music note 49 Prison room 51 Look askano 52 Addends 54 Wine vessel 56 Swiss mountain 58 Out of (prefix) 60 Whirl'.vind 1 n 3 M- 5 6 7 5 9 10 7^ 12 3 If S 6 7 16 ^ 19 20 ^m 12 1 :} 1 V 25 f ) 2b f 1 Z8 b » ii 3£ 5* m 31 I 55 3» S7 38 39 40 i ".I *2 1 Hi 1** ^5 4b HI 48 4-3 M 50 -' sa 55 h 55 â- :f;i â- s 57 58' fi 60 b\ bl -12 VOICE OF THE PRESS Old- Fashioned One nice thing about not being too famous is that you can keep the same wife year after year. â€" Guelph Mercury. Logical Ever think of it this way? The less food you waste, the less food you buy. The food you don't buy. is available for bulk shipment to the hunger lone. â€" Stratford Beacon -Herald. Discouraging When you think you're over- worked, just think of the busy bee. In order to make a honey crop, bees frorn a good colony must visit up to 520,000,000 flowers daring the season. â€" St. Thomas Times-Journal. This Is Drowning Season Reports from various places •how the drownir., season is get- ting well started. People will go out of their depth, will take canoes into dangerous waters or do some other crazy thing. There is not much ta be done about it, because every year so many people drow.i. Only thing to do is nuke sure the list does not include you. â€" Windsor Star. Reconversion Hint A mild suggestion: Let's forget all about "reconversion" and just let's go back to work. â€" Vancouver Province. Britons Still Strong The Empire may be weakened, but net the British people. There are many who believe that the post-war generation will be more enterprising and resourceful than their fathers. Certainly the British are the best risks in the world to- day â€" and the only strong compe- titors in the business of making the democratic system work. â€" New York Times. Hooked Eithei Way If you make out your income tax return wrong, you are in the hands of the law; and if ycu make it out right, you are in the hands of the receiver. â€" Drumheller Mail. But It Won't Happen What a revolution there would be if landlords suddenly began ad- vertising "no chi'dless couples need •PPly." â€" Edmonton Journal. Danger Ahead We have learned in Canada that this continent, if not the world, is one economic whole. We have felt repercussions from the American economic situation in more wayi than one. There is a considerable danger that we may take it for granted that American procedure must always be followed here. Un- less we take warning we may find ourselves drawn into a vortex of inflation we have so far succeeded in avoiding. â€" Halifax Chronicle. T&'i ou i" By C1.UYA5 VVUJJAitf AFTER A 6000 CEjSLCr STMtOS eCAMIMS Ai?0(JN6 VWNOeS^ IF MAYBe HK EWeRJMENTWG.BWSeS RO0M.IT WWWtNEAftLV HAS ©BtN A LITTLE WMSElf UP0NHI'5FECr SO HARD ;J5 HE THOUGHT OVtRCCNFlOENT.AS HIT n •*XSSID B€ Ut<S5 SUOOENLY 6I1CKUL Tli WR0N6 WAV REAMN? BALANCE, A,*© BEfilNNlNCi A6AIN TO I Get? LEGS UNDER lCC7«TR0L,B<JTlSSCwe. WHATC|«0NCERT£D8Y A TENDENW TO TCPPLfi OVER BACKW^aCS FEEL«l;REOPHlM'SEL.f euTLCCWATFLCOli ^TfCHKALAftMINtJLY FAR AWAY STARCH Goes CUTO^ «««LEiS5A5He«LlP« ' <Jlli£TLV IC FLOOS.FJO* «0001C6ITDCWNAUM Come East, Young Man Remember the old harvest «»• cursions? Remember the trains that pulled out fof the prairies, to the rolling plains and the wheat fields and the big meals and big talk of the west? That was a long time ago, friend, a long time ago. .Now its in re- verse. This year Ontario has a bumper crop. Our fields are rich with the good things of the earth. They have even called for 23,000 addi- tional men from the west to help gather in the harvest. Come east, young man, come east. â€" Hamilton Spectator. When Man Listens Some women think a man is very entertaining if he sits patiently and listens to them talk. â€" Brandon Stm. NNOR "Tp^^aT^ A remirkable new conact insecticide spray with tremendous killing power •gainst aphids, leaf hoppers, mealy bugs, thrips and other insects attack- ing vegetables, garden Howers hot- boose plants and certain rypes of &nit stock. An excellent replacement in many instances for nicotine sul- phate. In 1 OZ-, 5 oz., 16 oz. and 1 gal. sizes. Trmitrnxri Res a. AT YOUR LOCAL DEALER yi fUJlo^y^ THE SPORTING THING AKNUAL CilNVtNTlONJ THROAT "All those in tavor sa\ '.Ah'!" THE SPORTING THING "George 1 Roll over. You've been lyins: on your back for the last two" months!" POPâ€" The Ham By J. MILL.\R WATT SLAPPiN&s NO use - MUTT AND JEFF â€" hence the expressionâ€" -the poor fish" By BUD FISHER ^< REG'LAR FELLERSâ€" A New High in Reading By GENE BYRNES