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BITS OF HUMOR HOMIIEK&1UEK Still Struggling. "Ton .say they are twins, and yet on la five years older than her sister?" "Yes. You see one of them is mar- ried and one is not." Asking Too Much. "Keep still!" said mother, who was tying Helen's shoelace. "Well, I can't stand on one foot like * mailbox," protected the child. Cautious, Anyway. Father "That young man of yours has more brains than I gave him credit for." Daughter "Oh, papa, you really don't mean it!" Father "Yes; instead of coming to see me he called me up on the tele- phone." Anonymouc. In the church in a little town in Ala- bama. Deacon Lee arose one Sunday morning to read a list of subscribers to the missionary fund. He began: "The Rev. Montgomery Travers. |10; Brother Steve Walker, $5; Sister Margaret Kemp, $7; anonymous donor, myself, $6. In the Fall They Wire-less. Willie "Ma, teacher said the wires on the telepraph poles are educated." Ma "Sbe couldn't have said that. What did she mean?" Willie "Well, she said the wires ex- pand in summer and get saggy, while in winter they contract and become taut!" What Bobby Said. Bobby's mother was anxious to know whether he had obeyed her injunctions and behaved himself at the party. He was sure that he had. "When Mrs. Smith asked me if I wanted more cake. I said, 'No thank you.' " His mother was relieved, but wanted to know more. Did she ask you again?" "Yes, and I still told her, 'No,. thank you.' But after a while she asked me another time." Bobby looked confident. "I said what pa always says: 'Take the darned stuff away!' " Zeph the Optimist "I see you've got a new boss, Zeph," the mall carrier in a small town said to one of the inhabitants who was brush- ing a chestnut mare. "Ye-up," replied Zeph. "Do you trade often?" "Ye-up; Sat'day I swapped three times." "You must be doing pretty well." "Ye-up, pretty good; generally come out second best that isn't doing very bad, ie it?" "No, sir," said George. "I make it a rule never to pend more'n two-thirds of my wages on no account whatever." "Well, well," said the curate pleas- antly, "you put ttve rest in the bank, I awppoee?" "No," said George, "I put It to a better use than that, sir. I give it to the wife to keep house on." Not What He Ordered. The new curate wanted to make a good impression, it being his first ser- mon. He was determined not to neg- lect his personal appearance. Smoothing his hair, be said to the old verger: "Could you get me a glass? A small one will do." The verger hurried away, but sooa returned concealing something under his coat. "1 know what nervousness is," he said. "I've brought you a whole bot- tle." Light Relationship. Professor X has a bright boy who one day at the age of four appeurtH In his father's study clasping in his- \t nds a forlorn lcoklng little chicken which fciul strayed from a neighboring incu- bator. "WiHie," said his father, "take that chicken back to his mother." "Ain't dot any mudder," answered the child. "Well, then, take It back to Us tether." said the professor, determined to maintain parental authority. "Atn't dot any fadder," was the re- ply, "Ain't dot anything but an old lamp." Didn't Spend 'Em All. The curate was admonishing the vil- lage sport. "You ought not to spend all your wages. George." George in- dignantly retorted that ho did not. , "No?" queried the curate suspiciously. 2Iffe For RHEUMATIC SUFFERERS New Life Remedy is the Standard Remedy for the last quarter century for Rheumatism, Sciatica, Lum- bago, Neu.-aU-ia, Gout and Jleuritis. ' One bottle for One Dollar; Six bottles for Five Dollars. Mailed direct to customers. STrtuHifr Brmrbtj Company 78 West Adelaide Ct., Toronto Canada Can You Beat It? Harry, while on a visit to the coun- j try, became deeply interested in watch- : ing an old gardener. After a while the following dialogue took place: Gardener "Some flne vegetables here!" Harry "Rather." Gardener "I once grew a cabbage wihiich, when cut in two and the heart removed, made a grand cradle for kiddies!" Harry "It must have been a fine one! But we have some big vege- tables in London. I remember seeing three men sleeping on one beat!" Gardener "Three men?" Harry "Yes, policemen!" * Water. Many of the sayings of Jesus we do not fully understand uales we know something of Palestine. For example, take the phrase, "The water of Life." We who live in a land where we can get all the water we want merely by turning a small tap will find it hard to catch the real significance of these words of Jesus, unless we can see in imagination tbe land of the Jews as it lies parched under the August sun. In Palestine water is precious beyond be- lief. Near the ancient city of Jericho, on the slope that leads up from the level of the Dead Sea, is a barren waste much like parts of the Saihara Desert. It seems as if only a miracle could make anything grow on those rugged slopes; yet from Ellsha's Fountain just a few rods away water is brought, so that some of the land is a tropical garden in which is an abundance of tigs, olives, dates, bananas, oranges, pomegranates and luscious white grapes. That water works the miracle; it has actually caused the desert to blossom as the rose. It has produced life. Wherever the precepts of Christ are taught and believed life in tbe fullest sense of the word springs into being. Where they are denied there is death. Side by side on tbe Judean hills near the city of Jerusalem are two small villages. One is a model of cleanli- ness and thrift; you would be glad to choose it for a home. The other is an example of tilth and shiftle$sness; you would avoid staying there even for a single night. The one is Christian; the other is Moslem. One has prac- ticed the teachings of Him who was the Water of Itfe; the other has large- ly rejected those teachings. One stands for life; the other stands for death. ;\ All this wwld Is heavy with the promise of greater things. and a day will come, one day In toe unending succession of days, when beings (beings who are now latent in oar thoughts and hidden in oar loins) shall stand upon this earth as one stands upon a footstool, and shall laugh and reach out their hands amid the stars. H. G. Well*. Romantic Case of a Deaf Mute by War. Desert Flying. Th Royal Air Force has recemtty completed a chain of air-stations across the Syrian Desert, to enable -u air route between Cairo and Bagdad to be inaugurated. The first Air Force party to be sent i across the dieaert waa a oar convoy, says an English newspaper. They were charged with the. duty of select- ing suitable landing-grounds, and, more important still, of building a de- finite track across. The track waa essential because it WEEKLY nWBPA?XB THE REASON WHY i ANAEMAPREYAILS The Strenuous Conditions of Life To-day Responsible. Mothers who remark that girls to- day are more prone to anaemia than the girls of a generation ago. should i look back at Ch* surroundings in which i they and their companions lived. They ._.... . . D i would easily 3 ee the reason in life's | relic " numbered m thousands every , St.. Toronto. Ont Advertisement* HENS WANTED ALIVE; 25 CEXTS a pound. Albert Lewis, 664 Dundaa West. Toronto. WE HATE A CASH PURCHASER for a weekly newspaper In Oa- Price must be .attractive}. S*nd full Information to Wilson Publishing Co.. Ltd.. 7J Adelaide St. W.. Toronto. BELTING FOR SALE THREASHIRE BELTS AND SUC- TION hoae. new and used, shipped Btibject to approval at lowest prices In Canada. York Belting Co.. US Yoril wa A r I altered circumstances to-day. i| Now the school girl's life is more L strenuous ; one gives a small contri- bution towards the upkeep of this an- the Bologna hospital who lost memory,: are a numerous-studies | eient show pjc. to say nothing of the severe tax upon the strength. tip. demanded by the numerous inter- Silent Psalms. Not only in cloud tymn and psalm Is Gods love sung! Within the calm , . ------------ _ speech and hearing in the bombard-: Also, girls enter business soon after Pretors of history, guides stray Ara . Qf Uus , hl upoa the fieldg and moors . ' ment on the Austrian front and has , leaving school at an age when they ^ s* re not the faintest idea who he is. , most need rest and outdoor life. Their - For four years one family after an-J womanly development is hampered by other has claimed him until now he th stress of working hours, hurried has almost <LS many pa. ents as Italy's i and often scanty meate. Girls are unknown soldier, says a despatch from ', more liable to bloodlessness to-day. Rome. In Bologna Lady Emma Zara who demand some th<f y the - r A holy anthem swells and soars' , Tired feet tread out a sweet delight unwelcome attentions to other victims, i ^^^ p^ug of moss come (nto s , ent . Altogether, guarding this bit of j Spent hearts aing silemly . d1m eyes Noah's Ark is quite a profitable busi- j -p^ looks of praise to qulef skies , ! more uaoie to Diooouessness lo-aay, ness - and !t isi certain the guards i SouU a . weary . city-pressed. . : but there is this consolation that this w uM fa " "* lf sufficiently bribed, | Send God dumb tnanks for country orini became interested in the man condition is now more easily remedied and sent h>is photograph all over Italy tnan in the years past. Such medi- and Europe, precipitating a torrent of cine as Dr. Williams' Pink Pills has letters and telegrams, mysterious soldier as claiming the a son or hus- band. When the Government was Induced to give free passage to would be par- ents and wives countless pilgrimages began to Bologna, but the unfortunate man remained nobody's. Recently an old couple and a young wonwn, claim- ing to be the man's parents and wife, respectively arrived in Bologna. After viewing several soldiers stripped to the waist, they fell upon the deaf mute, showering him with kisses. The man of mystery showed no filial emotion. but seemed interested in the girt, who tore been bei P e(i b - v Dr W.Uiams said she waa his spouse. The visitors identified him as Maxi- milian Menichetti, but the suspicions of the authorities wer aroused by the solicitude of the self-styled wife in the amount of the pension received by the deaf mute. Investigation socn dis- closed the fact that th? real Menichetti was killed in the war and the girl was looking for a new provider. Meanwhile another family arrived from a remote province with the vil- so as to enable the over-zealous tour- ist to take back a chip of tbe Ark to show his family. helped thousands of weak, anaemic i * recorded that an Australian sol- girls and women, simply because they ' dier during the war badly wanted to contain the elements necessary to en- take a cutting from the splintered re- rich the blood, which means good ! Iic - Tne guards refused, and made health and vitality j some demonstration of protest: but This is proved by the statement of Miss Bldora Acker. Lake Pleasant, N.S., who some other ailing girl will profit by my experience with Dr. Williams' Pink tralian Tommy. Pills. I was very much run dtwr.; my face was pale and there was dark circles around my eyes. My appetite was bad, and I had no ambition to do anything or go about. I had once be- rest . Luian Gard Certainly Not. You can't expect to keep friends if yon give th-em away. your on being shown a bayonet in one liand ^d some money in the otier. they be- says: "I shall be glad if ' cam diplomatic and left the memory will profit by of Noah to the Jack-knife of the Aus- Those Having Sick Animals SHOULD USE lage priest and documents virtually identifying the deaf mute as Raphael Fananr. When the aged mother em- braced the soldier tears rolled down bis cheeks, but he immediately re- pulsed her. Pills and decided to try them again. It proved a wise decision, for In less than two months time I felt in every way better; had a splendid appetite, the tired feeling disappeared, and I can work with enjoyment. Naturally I think there is no better medicine for young girls than Dr. Williams' Pink Pills." You can procure Dr. Williams' Pink Pills through any dealer in m-c'icine or they will be sent to you by mail at 50 cents a bos or six boxes for $2.50 by writing direct to The Dr. Williams' Medicine Co., Brockville, Ont. * Not Loose. "Put out your tongue, my dear." said the doctor. LitUe Dorothy showed the tip of her tongue. "Come, come!" cried the doctor. "Put it right out:" "I I can't," replied Dorothy, tear- fully. "it's joined on at the back!" Long Range Camera. A long range motion picture camera has been perfected which has photo- graphed shell bursting as far away as 20,000 yards. Cargoes Sailors Dread. Recently three members of the crew of a French ship were killed by the cargo she waa carrying! This consist- ed of onions. Not only are these apt to swell when touched by water, but they give off a very unpleasant gas af- ter they hare been at ee for some time. Grain Is heartily disliked by sailors. Care must be taken that no moisture reaches such a cargo or the grain will swell and burst fit* ship like au egg- shell. The crew of a ship have to put up with many restrirticns when the ves- sel is carrying explosives. They must keep any sort of Light away from the cargo, and must smoke only In certain parts of the vessel. On entering port. the bhlp fiies ..he reu burgee or danger flag. Other ships, seeing this warning, give her a wide berth. Deck cargoes are always dangerous. especially if they consist of timber or trucks. In a storm they are likely to break adrift, no matter how securely they may be lashed. Before now ships have been lost as foe result of such accidents. Mock Suns. Mock suns are similar in point ot Evidently he has decided to adopt ! origin to the mirages of the desert, the other family, and he seems con- only they occur in the Arctic circle. As tented with his new wife. She now \ the long winter night of the polar re- coufesses that her dead soldier hus- g:on wanes, once every twenty-four band made her unhappy with his con- hours a slight glow is seen at some tinual scolding, ami says she much' point of the horizon. Often accompauy- prefers the deaf mute, who has never Ing this glow is seen the phenomenon spoken an unkind word. of the mock suns. Up in the heavens as many as live of thece spectral orbs have been seen at once. Invariably they are all connected in a geometric figure, the suns seemingly being bound together with circles and arcs of light. Often, when only one appears, it is mistaken for the ival sun, and natives , rejoice at the early end of the long No season of the year Is so danger- 1 winter n(gdlti only to be d i sappointed SUMMER HEAT HARD ON BABY ous to tho life of little ones as Is the summer. The excessive heat thrown the little stomach oat of order so quickly that unless prompt a'd fas at> hand the baby may be beyond all hu- man help before the mother realizes he Is 111. Summer is the season when diarrhoea, cholera infantum. dysentery and colic are most prevalent. An/ one of these troubles may prove deadly If) not promptly treated. During the sum- meate<1 us the image disappears. The ex- planation of the phenomenon is given hy physicists as refraction and reflec- ' tion of light from the real sun below the horizon on the miets In thie upper atmwsphere. o Photography by Wireless. Through wirelese means, supple- by an instrument somewhat mer'the mother's best friend" In Baby 7 * resembling in its mechanism the hu- Own Tablets. They regulate the man eyc - *' e sna!l be able before long , bowels, sweeten th stomach and keep to tajk to a P** 8011 hundreds of thous- baby healthy. The Tablets are sold ands ot mll<?s away - and at the s*" 1 * by medicine dealers or by mall at 25 time *** that P eTSOn ' ! ' fa ce- Convexsa Misleading. The tourist stood in front of a sign "Subway Entrances." "H'rn! It doesn't entrance me," he said coldly. cents a bo* from The Dr. Williams' Medicine Co.. Brockville, Ont. O Where Ignorance is Bliss. "My darling!" cried the romantic lover, "I offer you this delightful blos- som which I picked myself in a Held. May your life be like this flower and as beautiful as its fruit." And the maiden blushed with plea- sure, tor she did not know that the flower was a broad beau blossom. Duty others. is what one expects from L;nlmrrt Rtl|ov Nuralg! lion by radio will thereby be rendered more intimate and agreeable. We can even watch the other person's changes of expression while he talks ee him smile at a joke while we hear him laugh, etc. Nikohi Tesla, the famous electrician, Is responsible for this prediction. He says that he is now trying to perfect the requisite apparatus for this ex- pected new development of radio, which he calls "television." Surnames and Their Origin TULLY Variations Multully, Flood. Racial origin Irish. Source A given name. The Tully clan of Ireland is an off stool of the O'Neills, of Tyrone. ' "O'h-Maoltuile" ib b rather more j complicated spelling according to the [ Gaelic custom, and Multully is prob- ! ably the most accurate Anglicized ! form of the name if" you are Judging by j the s-pelling or pronunciation. Though . if you are going to take its meaning | as the standard you must award the ! first place to the form of Flood. The clan is one which date* from ] about the year 700 A.D.. which was , just about the t'me the Saxons were : busy completing their task of conquer- ' iug England, u period before the Dan- j ish Invasions of England and Ireland, i before tho great forays of the Vikings, and before the Norman invasion of ' Rngland. A chieftain named "Maottuile" . (which may be translated us "flood- ; follower") was the founder of the i clan. He was the brother of one of j the High Kings of Ireland, the 158th In that long Hue of cionarcbj) ot the ! Irish cation which began about 1700 j u.r. and did not ernl ua-til the death, ot ; Roderick O'Connor and the Anglo-Nor- man conquest of Ireland. KINSELLA Variations Kimaelagh. Klnsela, Klngsley, Kinsley. Racial Origin Irish. Source A nickname. Every once in a while you run across j ^n old an Irish family name wliu-'- does notj sound very Irish. There are not many I people, comparatively speaking, who j would regard Kinsella as an Irish j name. Just as there are not so many j who know that Costello is Irish and ( not Italian or Spanish Certainly any one might be forgiven for not thinking that the form Kings- ley is Irish. The Gaelic form of this family name Is "O'Ceannsalalghe." which, though It i does not look much like "O'KlnseUa," ( as a matter of fact is pronounced al- most exactly like it. The founder cf thin clan was a chief- tain who came of the Kavanagh line, named "Eauna," and sumanied "Cean- nsalach.' There seems little chance to avoid taking this surname as a per- sonal reflection, at least from our mod- ern viewpoint, though apparently the chieftain himself did net objoet to it. fur U menus "unclean head." Bunyan Gets New Nose. John Bunyan has got a new nose. For several years he h&s lain on his tomb in a London gravevard quite noseless a fact which has distressed hundreds of pilgrims who have come to pay him homage. His ncee had eitber been accidentally broken off or. more probable, stolen by some souve- nir hunter But now. thanks to the good offices of the Bapt:s<t and Congregational Un- ions. Bunyan's ill-used emgy is once more presentable. The only difficulty [ was that uo oue seemed to be quite certain of the exact shape of Bunyan's no*e and the stone maeon had to de- pend on toe advice of antiquarians and MONEY ORDERS. Send a Dominion Express Money Five dollars costs three cents. No Need to Talk. "Does the baby talk yet?" asked a friend of the family. "No." replied the baby's disgusted little brother, "the baby doesn't need to talk." "Doesn't need to talk?" "No. All the baby has to do is to i yell, and it gets everything that's worth having." Mlnard'i Liniment for u'a cvrywhr When cream is too thin to whip add the unbeaten white of an esg to it' first. It becomes a stiff as the rich- est of cream. ISSUE No. 3122. Dog Book on DOG DISEASES and How to t'etd Mailed Fro to any \d- Jrn bjr the Author. H. Clay Qlovn Co., lao. 129 Wact 24th Street Nw York. U.3.A. COARSE SALT LAND SALT Balk C&rlots TORONTO SALT WORKS a J. CUFF . TORONTO Good for all throat and chest disease*. Distemper. Garset. Sprains. Bruises, Colic. Mange. Spavins. Running Sores, etc.. etc. Should always be in th stable. SOLD EVERYWHERE. RETRIES MACHINERY TORONTO NURSE THINKS NOTHING BETTER Lydia E. Pinkham's Vege- table Compound Advised for all Women in Poor Health Cutkura Is The Best Beauty Doctor Daily use of Cuticura Soap, with touches of Cuticura Ointment now and then, keeps the skin fresh, smooth and clear. Cuticura Talcum is also ideal for the skin. 5<25c. nhlanlTluJ'iltc T.KorallSc. Sold throughout the Dominion. Canadian Depot: M. Lwtot M4 St. r.ol Si.. W.. MMtrMl. ubcura Sop .h.-. without mug. Toronto, Ontario. "I took Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound for years and it is the only patent medicine I ever recommend. I am a nurse and if I find a woman is in poor health I always tell her to take It. Although, you know that doctors and nurses do uot use patent medi- cines I must say that I thiuk there is nothing better than your Vegetabla Compound. When I first took 111 many years ago, 1 was so tired when I got up in the morning that I could not eat, and when I went to oed L was too tired to sleep. My mother- ia-law told me that Lydia E. Pink- ham's Vegetable Compound was just what I wanted so I tried it and only took two bottles when I felt better: Since then I have found that thera is nothing that makes me feel so well, for it seems to build my system right up. I don't know any other medicine that has done so much for women." MBS. W. H. P.VBKKR. 13 Wellesley Ave., Toronto. Ontario. Women testify again and again, that they have been helped by Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound "after other medicines have failed." It has been tried for nearly flfty years and not found wanting. If you are suffering from any of the various ailments which accom- pany female weakness try Lydia E. Finkhaiu's Vegetable Compound. UNLESS you see the name "Bayer" on tablets, you are not getting Aspirin at all Accept only an "unbroken package" of "Bayer Tablets of Aspirin," which contains directions and dose worked out by physicians during 22 years and proved safe by millions for Colds Headache Rheumatism Toothache Neuralgia Neuritis Earache Lumbago Pain, Pain Handy "Bayi-r" boxes of 12 tablets Also bottles of 24 ana 10> Druggists. Aiplrln Is the traje mark i registered In Canada) of Bayer Manufacture < Mono- aci'ilrncM.'sti-r of Sallcyllcni Id. WMli- It la welt known ihat Aspirin immna liaycr manufa.iure, to assist inn public atmlnnt Imitations, the T.ibK'ts of Bayer Company will b tmp<Kl with tholr nrl trwl* mark. t!. "Bayor Crow."