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MR, ESHOLT'S YOUNG WIFE TW T. \V. SI'KlcilT. GHAmiRI. .that J b* fet WKi a certain rhi of July ttte present century wax w.nir forty years f* younger than it is now. The moon" w i- H i "mi: in unclouded t>n K htees when Mis* Mat-is (iranhy, having -een that the pi. ]>arat:ona for supp, r were duly completed, filtered the drawing room, carrying a lighted lamp in her hand, and then to I perceived that the vicir was sitting hme in the dusk. Wiimnla luggs- lutotlieh Hi'iiJ > Then the vi 'ii t., i ,, ,.|. . soft tcli l,.ii fni a moonlight .stioll . n the \.-; audit, and tin- _\,n-'.' people were left ah i. . ' I.' ' n* go illhl the dl.iw nr: room." f .id I want you to sum me / ' " De u me, lirolher, where can A^nes and Wilmothave run off to?" she Haul " I left them sitting on the lofa not n qu.tr ri of >n hour ago, ami now" " I don't know, I'm sure, my dear," re- pin-. I Mr. Granby, routing himself frm one of thoM> reveries w lucu ol lute 1m. 1 become habitual with him. " I WAS umlei the impri - i<>n that they were titling theie Miw (iranby without IIIMI- ido took Wilmot. ' <'<!., .s///aiid inn- 01 iv.ii otlur fa\oiiritt-s win.-, will huml my inciiioiy W in II I .UN In m i\ '." Allies ...Mlfd hermit ut tin pi.uin ulld to Sim:. tvlnle \WIiiiotlH-ntoverher and tui u,., I the in mo. Doe of Ins bunds reilrd cfirest,mgly "n lier ilioiilili'i, mid now ami thru In, hps lightly touched her hair. Bill before long the striking of the clock wnrn.dil MI th:it in t. -n minute* itiore tho coach woiild he clu,., uid tliRtaine warning note brought back tho vicar and Miu Maria. The 1 if. r brought with her along Wor .ted iufotter i>t ,'., i , colours, her own linndi- HOW in i.i K* in 1:1.1 K m or III. Tr.if .| IB" In a I ii.ithli-llll.il If ond Trll* flow -It ! Done. I' ' mlstsk* iM a "profnwinntl" to f n. the other lay, to Mippos that we have KM) diffii-ulty in getting into houses we wish to " cl.U-k. " I lurg I u racau get in to an) ordinary h, ..- with cum-. In many cases it is oi.ly nccos- t-'uy to break |ne of gl-ms and thru-l a hand in and turn the knob of ad'iur or move tiie Listening of a window. An ordinary jim- my will op-iii any wooden door or window. Toforce open any of thcordiuary iron fasten- ings that are placed ouuidu of dwellings i. but the work of a few moments with modern burglars' tools, liars are plied apart with slow and powerful Jack screws that are almost strong enough lo raise buildings. The iron framework of an ordinary iron gate is easily displaced with a jimmy. Ordinary locks are not tin- slightest pro- tection against htirelikift. Simple skeleton keys will open common locks If a key is left 111 a door it is the easiest thing for a .it. i put a wire through th.' keyhole and, working from the outside of a door, turn the key on the inside This is acorn- parent provocation when there are no burg- lars about the premises, and thus unneces- sarily terrorize people at unseemly hours of thr night. There nave been some sad cases -'. people have been mistaken aud Jliw i.ranny without 11101.- nio tyilt up "LI ' insi.ic i ins is a com- tbe skirts of her dress and passed tlin.n.h ?.!, '", ch she proceed. . I u, enwrap mun practice with hotel thieves, and to , window . '. i.-imiiii-d go in quest of the missing on, - " S: rely he said to herself, as she rein in-.i f..r li-r |i*tl. i, ,, tor which old-fash, on, ..i mi, .es she yiic.l a private predilection, H.S bfing good f.ir the constitution in damp whither -" liiroly Wilmot can never Imve doeii fooli.h enough to trail that gn 1 .low . to the river aud the grass as wet a* it n ' With that .he clumped away through the moist hriibbery. a unpinied I, y I my, a favour- '. who, leing in a rno.i.-^tn.ck mood, I'.i.i d-d nn with devated tail m front of | her mistress, tml then stopping to munch , , . if ," '. Mr Utanby. hitting with a faint smile Wilmot's throat and ehett, .mil ue, veiled in it in an inextricable knot I Inn,!. ",- t ithntaiiding his liiughing rexinlan e and i p iiiu In re.pi. -.I th.it she wo. ild not make inch a " guy ' of him. Then the good old man drew \\ilmoi to his side on the sofa, and taking one of his hands in both Ins he ftddicxacd to him a few last words of kindly counsel and admonition. The young man listened with. low n.-.k-it eyes and alulf smile, on. lei ing within himself why elderly guard agiiinxt it Iniltii have eome into ;.-n- eral use. Hut even bolls can lie puttied back by expert burglars. The latent plan of doing tins IM by working through a key- liol" with u piece of steel wire and a stron < or.l The location of the bolt is obtain ng ed I , IIT.I| Mr!., no A movement in favor of funeral reform is gaining considerable strength in Kngland. The present funeral customs are being at- taked lx>th from the sanitary and economic. il side ; they are defended upon the ground of sentiment, in part sound and in part false. No one ran tin.i fault with the sentiment which calls for tender and respectful treat m, nt of the dead ; but the desire for osten- tation with some and the tyranny of custom with others have led to some foolish and coxtly observances. To haggle over the ex- pense of a funeral seems like a slight to the dead, and so many sensible people submit to an expense which m ikes a serious inroad upon their revenues and is an injustice to t h i living. Few individuals have the courage tc withstand the oppression of custom and, in the caw of burials of their own rela- tives, to take a course which will cause the tongues of the gossip-mongers to wag. The best way of overcoming the evil is by con- I action, such as that which in Kngland is taken by several associkt ions for the pro- motion of funeral reforms. One of the reforms which they advocate is the use of inexpen- sive shrouds and coffins in place of the costly things in which the remains are low either by observation in the daytime or by ! enclosed. A sound and healthy sentiment exploration at night. The skilful use of | o ulj *' e no distinction between a cothn of this s'eel wire aud cold inal, . .trong IKIW, ll.e string of which i, i;-, ! .. shove back a b ,! This instrument 1.4 Mjinvtimes should see no distinction lietween a cotim of pine and one of elm or walnut. In the for- est the pine tree is as beautitul and graceful as any of its neighbors, and the uses to people should nrnrly always be no much n, , I.- railed "The \\iddie," which is ihe burg- I which it is put are no less honorrble. A cs..i ' \ ..11. 1 in, -i. . me than young ones. It w grs*. till .he came up, rubbed "against her f*" 1 ll " rl . 1 '"" "" eml to the Vlc * r '" " 10 ""- fr .-are utterance t!, a plaintive nn,w. and '"f" , ,*!".* vk * r '" '"" '""' lr< red o as before, j wheeled the luggage to the gale, and our a lelief to him when the IMM of 'In the >gue .1 iixon, thr vicar's Mian, had aln i.ly P"> ' not only cheaper than one of i I not essentially a night fastening. It is I t, i iinlv intended to hold a door while the inside, opens it to see who in outside, now followed it, MIN.S Mann with hovering round his inouth. and one linger ' IIU J" whlt ,' " lmwl P im ""' " V( ' r ''"' f:l ' n.m-rtc.l U-tw.cn the leave, of calf Ixiund C ft l ". k '"'P . tlie "'K 1 " " "" Ax they ; pereoi r , volume of MTIIIOIIS, was left alone in the W ' down the garden path, she pus cd and is a pic, nation agaiu.t being taken by I imp lighted t. ..in. luto " ''mot's unrelnctant hand n .silk purm- sin pi ie by having a door suddenly pushed M uiwhiUs, the fugitive, had wandered " wn " mk " 1L : not an <-mpty pur.e by inwaid by an intruder. -lowly through the meadow which skitt-d * ' """ 4nH - s hewi- Ins golmother, and, biirglar. can pu.b back an ordini ! he vicarage garden, and now stood two * " '""I lo.l IM.HI his parent, when 0,1111- window catch by in.,, rtmg a thin . lithe nnl y.c.thfiil figures, watching ,'iung i iv. i seaward How from Ihe inner land." and li.U-ning to lU dreary alumberoM murmur, hut w;th very nppo.itc .-i. To tin- ears of the girl it sonn 1,-d like * inournful valediction whispered l.y : "r she and Wilmot were to Dai* to infill, and her sinking heart re- '1 " farewell," and te.irn .plan.- to s, >o that the n.oon |,,ked Id ami dim. To \\ilmot llmrd it llkr the far-off miiriuur of th distant ,, .in a'iiosr water. he was so soon to wander and separation from her In- loved, or U-lievod hi I >v, ,1, crossed his mind, it w but as a transient shadow whn h left no nnpreaskn ln-liii.il You'll think of me sometimes when I'm lar away, won't you, darling?" be Hiked as he drew Agnes'x riu .loner within his own and turned towards the house. the >"""*' " ne n d lways looked upon In being in some sort he own special pi opci t \. The coach came rattling ui>. There was a up last hand shake for the vicar, a hearty kiss for Mils Maria, a more lingering >ne, or it maj lie more than one, for Agnes, with a whs|>ercd, "Do not lorp I m , dm ling, and write as often as you .in; and then VVMi: ot l<-.i|-.-d blithely upbcside the driver. IM( ( A w.ivi- of the hand, a era, k of the whip, a mdeil l ' 1:1 ' t f """ ""' K"d s bngle, and they were 'iiii'iTjii .. ff i:_ ii .. * . " " ""' " gra.lua!ly into ihe t.. Uvome ,ummc, , M irtion rdinary ase knife. The newest window catchca are arranged no ax to prevent thix. Fastenings on u.nnleii window .shiitt.-i-, or blinds are solemn words, " earth to earth," are realis- ed. There ia something barbarous in the idea of fashioning costly trappings for no other purpose than burying them in the earth ; while the shrouds and dresses in which the body is attired are sometimes positively grotesque. What sentiment is gratified by unclosing the stiffened limbs in a full dress suit, with its associations of the ball, the Uin.|iiet, the theatre, the gayest and most thoughtless hours of life? Surely would be infinitely more ea.-ily burglari/ed by means of boring and j a P' ln sawing. The profenaioiui! burglars have an """nn and dignified. In these and other old tune method of breaking window panes ' m"ers sound sentiment as well as economy without noise. They lir.t piste over i and m'lry consideration, are on the side the pane to lie cracked a complete of the advocates of reform, covering of puper. Then when the pane is cracked by a .low, steady pres- sure, which is quite ax effective as a NW I* i: r I h . " Our young people do not know how to if any thought of his approaching fit ' then l''t'''-l by the ear alone, tilltb*!, old ,, thixl, and parti .. ' too, failed and sileneeclaime<litxowiraga-ii and sadly the three who were left went back to the house, over which a .had ,.w seemed already to have fallen. Already they missed Wilmot's lighthearted laughter mid the fresh brightness of his handsome face. Little inclined for sleep was Agnrs when went lo her own room Tie ,,,.,, n ' How can you ask V she said with a ti em- !ing voice in whuh there was a faint rina T ..-. -.<. .^-um- mi. of repr.*ch. ' You know that I shall think , r ' a " d *"!* " f ""' '"'" of you very, very of tn. ' whisper sailly at the casement blow, there is only a sort of crunching noise , breathe, suid an old doctor to an anxious no falling of glass. This is really an mother win we daughter, a young girl, of 17, . nl uly applicable to had had for some time a severe cold that had of the front doors in present use. It slightly alluded the upper air passages of seems to bi tlie universal custom to light her lungs, " When the child inflates her flout halls with side lights, everv one ot ' lungs as I direct her you can hear ihe crack- which is a constant invitation to the burg- ling of all tin- dissm-d air cells that for the lar to come al his leisure, break one mde firs! time have been brought into play this light, thrust Ins hand in the opening, and ' winter. You see," he went on " the ten- turn Ihe knob or key. This is easily done, dency of all persons is to use only the upper ( so as not to alarm a sleeping household, by portion* of the lungs. It is only after the one dear candle and sat of you very, very -.... - " I knew you would bef,, 1 a.k,,d ; but 5*"" * '! e ''"* ""} '"' r I can t have the .weet assurance too often e low window bent. All things fore most houses have iron rom v>nr lips." Then to himself "Con- 1 *f" kf of him : tlle "''' summer house, dimly basement doors, f jund" ,t all ! I i,t,ite forgot lo call at the ucc ""' <i . where they had spent so many H'd l.,on this afternoon for that half box of , SW u ?", ! Si '1 U1V< ""'" K l ( "l llft "'- "P It's I wnlc " ne "*" c '"""''d when a Ixiy ; the dis- tant river, on whose luiiks they had so. .lien wandered. She gazed, immersed in u thou Culta. which the landlord promivd m an awful nuuanue. Too late now, of course, to l.-l.-ll it." Hi. y paced in -.1- :i. .-foi alittlcwhilc.lhen Wilmotsaid; " And you'll write me lota of letters, won't you, dear? Never mind my short ones. You don't know under what dis- tdvaiilagra a fellow writes on Uiur.l ship so much to dutract his attention no many dutie. to attend to -so little lime to him self, tlmt it's almost Love's labour lost to attempt it Why, you are quite melancholy to night. ( 'berr, up little one. will soon pass away, and then Tw o years Hut here taking advantage of Ihe noise of a passing fatigue and exertion consequent on unusual her chain- ' vehicle. It is tacitly admitted that no exercise that the lower part is ulili/ed al seemed lo ordinary door under a front step ix safe. all. And jusl as people can live for years because a burglar once there can work With only one sound lung, so can everyone without .ilmerv.iiion at Ins leisure. There- | use only the upper (Million and feel well to their j enough at the lime, (in Is, therefore, draw their corset strings and say it doesn't hurt in A good deal of burglars' work is done by the least to wear .hen strings a little tight ; mean, of inside confederates, dishonest and apparently they are right. They play- servant., or employees, whose part of the tennis and ride aud row and even swim in work consists in furnishing easy access lo the their well pulled in lays ; but let illness skilled burglar, who doe. not wish to run attend them, let them need all their lung .and memories, till she lost all sense of time I the risk of dele turn while l,r. akmg into a power t.. provide puic blood or breathing and place. Her spirit Hew forth into the household, but i able, once in, to break into 'room to resist disease, or let Ihe careo of ma- mghl lo embrace his, piir.uing him, s Ariel self, along the i , ., I Tie had iftas _ K" ne - And not on thai night alone, but on many after nights, when the winds were high and the black waters troubled, did .he wander forth in fancy through the waste of dark- ness in search of him she had lost. Wilmot, meanwhile, was In-mg whirled rapidly along toward hi. destination. He comes aunty in search of us, so now we may happened to lie the only outside passeu er and in ten minutes after taking the box sent out for |ualls. Hut Wilmot was mistaken, for Miss Maria, *li In- and the driver had become the best of a safe or a strong Imx . In such cases care is ternity come upon them, then they may taken to remove suspicion from the inside regret thai they wilfully sinned against confederate, by making some marks on a door nature. or window to look as if entrance had IHMMI 1 " But many err, too, simply through uui :.,i i ,1 that way. ue.s, a lack of knowledge, or through bad I n city houses the nurglars often receive habits ot puti.il breathing contracted m material aid lo obtain entnin-e by upper 'youth ; bul, be that as it may, not one pen, MI 111 lii, or even -.1), knows how to breath. If iy npii story windows by means of architectural adornment.. In manycikse. the rough stone.. the cervices, the carvings, the aud other ornaments of house convenient ladders by which burglars climb I had my way I should teach Irojeclions, breathing in every school in the country. Mere i. an exercise I want your daughter Ui pr fro nts from >i i in. vi ,s iioniakiii, 1 1/1 ,| iss .11 ui IA, >>* *,.. H.F ,,,- ,,,-s i > >i . .* .- would probahly at any olber lime have '"ends. Doth driver and guard nni.t help >" "I'l"' lll> " > enter easily at points -d them as heat lily as she knew how. ' themselves out of h cigar case, and as often I whlch are >'>" guided than ihe scolded Ihem as heartily as she knew how, themselves oul of his cigar case, andas often - _ win. h .t the l*..t was but poorly, rpmem I U".V "topped to change horses, each of i >-' t( ' * """'? "" 'nsid- the U-rmg that be had but two more hours to ' them must naveaglassof "something hot " bur Ul m ke ." h " w y tlr " t to the front door so tha .he can feel it indating all the air practice Light and morning ; and so excel lent are its effects thai I have known it even to i mi- incipient consumption. While you .omit l.i slowly, let her take a long breath, stav with them, was t<Mi much melted by the thought to lie more than mildly cross, and wa., indeed, morr inclined for tears than aught else "Come in, you foolish child- ren, du '" she exclaimed with a little iiuaver in hrr voire. " You will catch your deaths of .old, and .upper will lie <|uile spoiled though neither of you deserve* any, after runmiiL' may in this t.i-lnon " " Don t ny that, ma flifrf narraiii < ," re- pli..l \Vilnmt gaily. Thru with a .sigh, wh ..I. however, had nothing of uidnens m - rough sup at his expense Wilmot dearly loved lo play aml P r "l"" 'r easy egress in case of dete. u_ . . . i , .. \i ia _ J lion. th e part Don Magnitico in his lillle way. Thu coach drew up in Dale Street, l.n. r po.,1. nexl morning as the clocks werestrik It might be suppoiwd that a very cth'cient protection to a closed door or shutter would Lu a cross bar inside of wood or iron. Uurg ------ . ing six, by which time the young man wan ' Jars, however, have a simple method of pretty well " slewed up " as he termed it ; removing snrh an obstruction They tir.t so he made his way at once to the Cr,x,l,,l hxiate the Iwr by boring, and thru either lift eet Kast, where he it out of it* socket or aaw it apart. gh supper I shall on cither ol you Hillrt in Kxchange Street ordered a lied and lept till four o'clock in the afternoon. He arotte in the \>ett. possible humour with himself and every body. Miss He had examined the content* of Mam's purse, which proved more valuable than he had expected ; so, as he was to sail in the course of a few days and could not make sure of. mother evening In himself, he derided to sc.k out i COUple of friend., whom he would treat to a tint rate dinner and a box at tho theatre afterward*. Hang the expense ! the little purse would stand it all. He had not forgotten Agnes by no means. II. often though ^ her, and always of a connectim; wne In snnle play.ng the pi.- is.uitei. What with and his piivate income, It Ah ' many', th h*>. lloie I net eyes m i. n On ruling the vicarage they found Mr. lii.ml,\ .-lowly |i ing the room with his hands U hind bun a lull, line looking old man, hut with an indefinable .omelhing in his expression which , emed to betoken a certain vacillation of purpose and inliiiiiily of will. "ippn i- over , for they were all! pi. .! lo eat much. At Ihe con- clusion ot (In- meal, Mr. (iianby, having drawn Ihc < n k olal,,>nle of his choicesl P ,i'. .n op. i ii.on he would entrust to no ii uid. hut his own, arose, glass in hand. " I drink,' s.ud he with inn. h solemnity, pn.h ing up his p. . la- I,. ,,n Ins loichcad. " lo I !.< health ,.l t In- son of my nl I. st friend to ,' Ii ii i ell. May he have a suf.- ami pi ..(MM ..us voyage, and may we nil In- hem ( nn on Ins u-tiirn '" \\ il ...; made a nc.t, sailor like K|H . . h in n win. h, after leteirmg to the days Hi... ..I. all then ,:ollci t Ions ot III, I, In- .aid, had u-f.-ienci! ill a greater 01 < | I I M, n piesi nl and in . hi.-h they i li.-ii were, he i I'Mcilv ., ' ii | i iispe. Is of his man- I in ,1, ui,, I hoped, in , on.:lusioii, thai a new I -^BS-^S- aou'd in it little whilf bind I Tho abstract of business done by the in him .ii:l ' i I iho-r whom hu had loved ] suiunce. companies of Canada last year has .noil'.. 1 from hi. youth upward. There been issued by Ihe Department of Finance. was a i ,.i pause after ho sat down, ; The five premiums received totalled |S,K41, wlii- i >nt with pathos to all there li'JS, an m i, us, <>f a quarter of a million oth jocngnian himself. over IH8'.. The lloyal, as usual, leads with And now \lis.Maiialn-caincrt-stleas and | $ft.W, 7 '-'.'< , followed by the Western with incasy, refei ring frequently to the t n, n-pii'', t:i:i'i, I'.Ml, tint LiverpiHil. Ixmdon A (llobu n. I listening intently for the slightest noise, tV.7U.MU, Coiumrrsial I'moii .tlo.f>!l7, ,r.,m without, for fear Wilmot might miss North Urittsh 8.1 1 3,'247, tl. Queen fJtt'J.-tH'i 'he night -coach by which he was to travel, the Lancashire 9iKI,-tM. Of the total of alih.iugli quite aware that it wan not duo for ! f.~i,SII ,-_N the British companies received another half hour. Presently sh, left the f I,(l7l , c' the Canadian |I,9M,MI uml rnnmtnrlbf llurtUMC of Ukll.fvilo' llCrfl'Jf tllu A IIH I I, ^1 The plan iniMl generally adopted now lo prevent burglary of safes that contain large .mounts of valuable property isto placelh. in ill full I :;lil where watchmen or policemen passing may have a full view ti nn the out side day and night by me. ins of eye holes in the xhulUirs, or where these are not in use, through a certain part of the shop window. Another precaution is by means of electric alarm.. l<ul the burglars have U-gim to sludy el.-.tii.ity, too, ami one of their latest devices is a method of fixing Ihe wires so that no alarm will be sounded The pi in ,1)1,1! of the alarm is generally the breaking cells of the lower p,i I of their lungs. When you retch 15 let her begin slowly to expel the air from her lungs and keep on until another !."> are counted. A few tunes will tire her much at first, anil bring on lit* of coughing : but let her pel-severe and she will soon ! able to do it HI or I- times at ei.-h exercise. Audi think I can promi.o you material benefit." A T . K. Trilrunc. r., i...,, al a > . ,i,n,,_ I ,.i l.o. IsVM.I.K, Kv .April JS Fro II the ef Id is of poison taken at the Snooks Hirr wed ding a! l.y n !.!-., Wcdnuaday evening, Frank II thru-, one of the wealthiest and best km.* n residents of I , mi is v i Me, died this mom ing, Mi., i. uilii i. and her sister, Mr. Unlit (iray, are down its victims of Ihe same poi son The attending physicians are contideitt nil are xuHering from arsenic poisoning, and ihey I'.'hev c ihe drug was put ill the coffee at the wedding dinner fur the purpose of si J:IM. MMILU. The peach crop may fail, but the hen'i never. .J>utU> in 4 wuuiltrful mimic. He can tak anytiody off. A smippT up of uif Mnsidered trifles fondling asylum. Jiulga " Siaglc or married ? " Prisoner sighs fleeply. "Oh, yen I nee married." A man naturally finds i\ necessary to have recourse to his " un> " after he has " ,iunt:c.l." In spite of all that can be laid in faor of A.luiiAtiil Kve, they were -tdoubtedly a shiftless pair. It doesn't follow, becauite a pedestrian 1.1 a nulesian, that he can make a ~ule easier than his competitors. A man can subdue 1 1,.: elephant, tl e lion and the rhinoceros, but the " tiger" k 'enev- ally gets the best of him. WTifii two girls meet they kiss. \Vbrn two men me.;!, tkey don't. This tUcwa plainly who want kissing the most. Loquaciousness in a man i. a great uu, sauce to his friends. It is a great pity thai those who are disposed to dilate da not die early. Sweet and bitter A girl is sweet but, oh ! how bitter The same girl is when her dress don't fit her ! Walu "Poor Timmins ! I fear he is losing his mind. " 1'otu " Well, there is one consolation. When a man looses hu mind he never misses it." Politician " Are they in favor of the secret ballot in Minnesota?' Thespian " Yes, 1 should judge so. They have pro- hibitod the ballot in public. Bloohumper " They called in Dr. Filler, it seems, to set Jones' leg. " Dr. Kineen (a rival of Piller) " Filler set a leg ! Why, he couldn't set a hen I" Mrs. Noear " Do you think my daughter will be a musician? Professor"! gant zay, mad ime. She may. She dell me she gone of a long-lived vamily." " I like your cheek !" exclaimed the girl when the young man kissed her. "So do I like youn, bat 1 greatly prefer your lips, was the audacious reply. "Is she really your rival?" " Ye*." '(ireat Scott : If I had a rival that looked like that, do you know what I would do?" No." " I'd give up the girl." People who arc constantly talking " wtiat i due society " often forget altogether w hat ia due to themselves, to say nothing of what U due to the butcher and baker. Colonel Yerger " Who u that tail young lady over there?" Gilhoojy " Well, she was my future wife a couple of months ago before the engagement was broken off. ' He taught his wife the sin of dress \\ ith eloquence and power, And then played billiards nil day long At sixty cents an hour. Hicks " Maria, I don't believe you would wake up if Gabriel were to blow his horn '" Mrs. Hicks " You would j the faintect sug- gestion of a born would rout you out early." " I have tried many ways of getting ahead," writes i subscriber. "Can you give me sonic advice ?" Our temperance editor suggests. Why don't you try mix- iug your drinks? ' VVhy is it that you write your bills on roee paper with perfumed envelopes?" " Be- cause," answered the tailor, " the young fel- low will imagine it's a love letter and are sure to open it." Love may be blind, but Love can see That tneic'a plenty of room for two On one small chair it they sit with care And stick jtixt as clone as glue ! " I liked the sermon H.I much to-day," .kid the old lady to the clergymen. " In- deed ' .aid he, evidently pleased. " Yes," she went, on ; " it reminded me so much of one I reml when 1 wuu a girl." Teacher" Where do we obtain coal. Freddy?" Freddy--" From the coal Iwdi, ma'am." Teacher "Right! Now, Jimmy where do we obtain feathers?" Jimmy-- " From the feather beds, ma'am." Well dressed Party" No, I've get noth ing for yon. Ain't you nshamed to ) )>eg- gmg? 'Iteggar " You are the one to l ashamed dresacd up like a gentleman in, I never a nickel in your clothes." A correspondent wants to know why green turtle is the sort almost exclusively u.ed for food. We arc not very sure, but we surmise that the green turtle is caught easier than almost any other kind. The character of a man is told liy the way his jaw runs in, So, too, a woman may be judged tjuite easy by her chin. "I mid in looking over your bill of col- lege expenses, my .on, that almost all the charges are for beer and wine, but nothing for kerosene. It seem, to me that you arc ' Kut, dear, father, a fellow can't Jrink kerosene." with a little self -sat i.licd lonnd his mouth. lt\ Jove ! what a lucky follow he was. Here was a gill, as pretty as you would see in a day's walk, who loved him with all Ihe furvonr of her fresh young heart, and had pioniMcd to wait till he should be in a po-.ni m to marry her a girl with good expectations, too, which made matters all his living Ih. oil vicar inn. I be decidedly "warm, and he did mil look like a man who would lioiib le this world many year, longer. Wil mot liinrcll fell thai he would have given 11,11, h for u peep at Mr. (iianhy's banking a, count. (TO UK roSTINI I'll.) InnuJ.in bavi man, iced to get along without even slai ting th<. electric alarm The gen.-i nl Held for bank burglars is now in country towns, and the most successful house burglaries me in coiinli y residence,., where interference fiom the outside is l.-.-i likely. Kut one way and another, the best known burglar, have come to much ,. i , : Ih, \ m iv Miicc.-ed for a lime, but tl.ey in vai nl.lv fall over it trifling ei i or of judgment and 1.1 el with lh. n .lessen-,. In Canada mid the Stales it M lioth a pre if law and the experience of fact sumption of ihai burglars woi k with tin- inlcnlion i., c imnnl murder if necessary to enable them I|H- There, a burglar caught in the act may lie justifiably killed, and there nro ,.< isiomil insi inces of sturdy householders ta klmg burglars with HIICCCS- I'olicv au- thoiitius are iiniinimoini that the bent way to 1.1 klc a burglar is to shoot him before he knows you nave been him, or to give, an alarm so that axaistants may come and help to catch him Hem-rally the burglar will drop his plunder and run if he can. Noise is the best protection against .burg- lars. A barking dog, a crying child, a stun, I, In in the dark, a heavy walk, a late comer into n house, and occasionally a bin n lar alaftn, will make a burglar drop bis swag and run Thu trouble with buiglar alarms is that they often go oil without ,.p sutlerei. indicates arsenic, and if the physi cians are correct a most diabolical crime has been committed. By whom such an act could have beei: coinmilled has not been even conjectured. I hal such a Ihmg could have lieen an accident is impossible, as there was no arseuic about tbe place The condi non of I! K. Sulclilf,'. d.iiighti-r and Miss II, MI is a'arming. Tbe Kcv. T. T. Martin, uhop.rloimed the cermony, in in a very ciitical condition. Tbe eight guests who are al Mr Herr's house are all veiy ill. Mr. and MIH. Snook's started on then bridal tour si after the wedding, but w.ie taken suddenly ill in Cnicinniti riuirsdty, and uric compelled to return lo Louisville. The , on. In KM, critical. of Uith is now said to bo I I,, trouble with regard to the outbreak see.ms to IH- that nobody out . id., h. is any chain e of finding out how matter. ai c going. With the telegraphs and post. o.n.'c iirr.kii^eiiiciils in tho hands of the (lov ei n i nen t, ho have also shut up all the new. pa pi TS but two, which they now employ in issuing fabrloated news, n is hard to ju.lgo of the. progress of allairs. Action i. rcpoi tc.l to have been taken by the I'.nlish Consul to si-cine fiom the t.ovci nmcni heavy damages for the lo,sen incurred by Hi ilish Snbjeets, and it M-, in- pioi..il.|c -.hat these claims m.iy bu backed U(> in I .on Jon. There has been a pleaaaut exchange of civilities between the v'"ccn and M. Carnot since her arrival in France. The 1're.i.lent of the republic sent the following message >,> the British soveiiiign : " Bog y..i.. Mi to graciously accept, on the occasion of your Majesty's arrival at (irasse, my wishes that your stay in the province may IK- as pleafant as were your previous VLSI: a lo I'.ian it/ and Aix. I would ask if I an be ot any service to your Majesty, mid I tender to your Majesty, with my respectful homage, the renewed expression uf my sin- cere regard." Thr Queen replied u follows : 1 thank you with all my heart for vuir very kind telegram. I am deeply tm.i Ii. ,1 by the cordial welcome which I received everywhere in my passage thiou^h K ance and on my arrival here in this liciu-iful ..oiintry." I mm figure.) lately published relating t.i the liquor trade m Amen a son,, -i id .... niiiv bo formed of the pio|H,i ti.,n. of the rum power in the ctnmtry. In N'ew York city i 1 . me. having a population ol a million and 1 a halt, the trade ia liquors is estimate. I at ' $SHI,tKX),OUO annually ; while in xiipp.,:t of its churches of all denominations, which may bo supposed to represent the chief counteracting mouil agency, mil more 1 1, .in J.'i.lKHMHiO, it is believed, arc annully spent. In the whole Union, icprcncnling a popula- tion of ti-.IM.'i'.tiHI, ?!Mi,l)00,<XI are .,p, nl each year foi i ,, wl.Mv over uiidiiliovc this there is an annmil charge of $400,JUO,(NXi tor the maintcuai'.cc of prison!, poorhouse, hos- pitals, and asylums, w huso inmates arc, tor thumost part, tin- vi lima of the steadily extending trade in drink.