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• m w i l iil«»»Jii>i>iHi III* * I 'A DOUGLAS! A DOUGLAS 1 MAKITIMB BANK FAILURE. Xlie Solon of b Noble ScottiBb UoQie Jailed lor Anuoylnu » Hlfb Boru U»u.e-An Eccentric Uaredevll Family. A London cable B»y8 : London Bocioty ia JlndinK time even amid the Derby distrao- tiouB to talk abOQt the latest aristocratic â- osndal, and the talk will become fast and £ariou9 when tne nowBpapera announce the direlul nowa of the impriaonment of a real live nobleman. A couple of years ago Lord James Douglas, of the noble houao of Queensberry, met Mabel, the daughter of Lady Soott, and was pleased to fall in love with the young lady, who was still in her teens and a ward of Chancery, or, what ia considered more probable, with the money to which she would become entitled when of ago. Ilia love was not reciprocated, but liOrd James declined to take his diumiaaal aa a gentleman should and began a course of syfltematic annoyance of the lady, whose mother waa tinally compelled to ovoko the Mil-powerful protection of the Coart of Chancery against Ilia Lordship'a persecu- tion. The Court sharply reprimanded the nngentlemanly lover and solemnly warned him ho would be aent to prison Bhould he attempt to hold any communication with Miss Mabel. Lord Jamea' friends perauaded him to go on a long yachting to«r in the Mediterranean, hoping that abaeuou and time would bring him to his senses. He wenttothe Mediter- ranean, but continued to brood over hia dismisBal, and finally decided to defy the Court of Chancery. The defiance took the form of »u indecent photograph whioh he posted to Miss Bcott. At Chriatniaa he once more thought of the loved one, and he made her aware of his continued existence and remembrance by sending her an indeli- cate card. The lady's relatives fretted and fumed, but Lord Jamea kept out of the country until last week. Then the powers of the Court of Chancery were for a second time invoked. The counsel for the noble culprit humbly aixilogiztd in bis bcnalf, bat Justice Cbitty was stern. The former leniency, said his judicial. Lordahip, had been thrown away, and ho ordered Lord James to be committed to priaon for con- tempt, adding, aa though frightened at his own audacity in sending a peer to jail, that he would entertain a plea for the defend- ant's rcleaue in a fortnight. After his cap- ture society gloated over the scandal, but fretted Boraewhat at seeing one of themaelvea in prison garb. Lady Flor- ence Dixie, the defcndant'a hiater, wrote a pastiionate letter to the uowapaptra, Erotesting that lur brother waa not the lackguard which the evidence clearly S roved him to be, asserting that in hia ealings with women ho was chivalrous in the extreme, and that the Christmas card of which 80 much bad been made waa not at all indelicate. No one else came to Lord Jamea' rescue. The court hardened its heart, and the Chancery Tipstafl, with daatice Chitty's warrant in hia i>ocket, prowled around the west end until last night, when he bagged hia game. His l..ord- â- bip was good enough to offer no resistance, Uo was hustled into a cab, and ia now meditating within the gloomy walls of liol loway Jail. The living membera of the Qaoenabcrry family are, to put it mildly, somewhat ecoonlric. The present Maniuia is an avowed freethinker, a famous amateur boxer and a dare-devil steeplechase rider. He used to sit in the Ilonue of Lords an the Bcotch repreaenlative peer, but sonic years ago hia peers, shocked by hia public avowiila oi aoepticism, refused to ro-eloct him. His next brother became a Iloman Catholic, and ia now a monk laboring among the very poor of this groat city. Bia third brother ia Lord James and hit aiater ia I«dy Floreuoo Dixje, au equally dare-devil ateeplechaser, a world-^ide traveller and writer, and the friend and advocate of Cctywayo, the black King ofZululand, who was treated so infamously by the Uritiah Government and died of a broken heart in consequence. . -^^ noCTttlt TORN l«Y A l)0<i. Terrlbln FIkIiI wllli itii Aiicry Kriitv hikI Feart r»r tlir Itoiill. A lloaton, Mass., dcHpalcli aays : Dr. George W. (Jalviii waa attacked and badly bitten on Saturday evening laat by a bull maatiff, under circunistanoes most peculiar. Together with Dr. Dixon, of Uertaton atreel, he waa called to attend Mrs. Uurd, of No. 61 lieach street. It was found expedient to etheri/.o her, and during the operation a bull maatiff, which had been alecping quietly in a corner of the room, made a â- pring for the doctor. In the wriat of the faithful physician tlio infuriated boast faatonod his fangs and a terrible tnaalo «nsned. Over the floor they rolled until the angered beaHt, wlioao head had been in chancery, managed to faatcii his tooth in the thigh of the iihysician. The dog clung with the tenacity of hiu breed until Dr. Uiion, the associate of Dr. Oalvin, having performed hia dutica at the bedside, oainu to the asaistaniHi of hia confrere and together they strangled the dog to death. Dr. (lalviii at oncu proooeded to hisolUce in the United Ktatoa Hotel and summoned Dr. Watts, who cauterized the wounds in the wriat and thigh. l>r. Ualvin's wounda are painful, and he is in fear of the dread- ful coiise(|UuiiceBthat may roault. A UBIUB'S SCICIDE. 8tartllu( Bevelatloujt Hade In Courtâ€" The Munaser Uelleved to Uave Kept Two SetH of llooknâ€" Nearly a lailliou and a Half of aDellclt. A St. John, N. B., despatch says : Borne Btartliug facts relative to the defunct Maritime Bank have leaked out lately in connection with the trial of the Bank of Nova Scotia vs. Uarrison. A short time prior to the failure, Mr. A. A. Sterling, of Fredericton, who had been a director in the bank, sold out a large portion of hia atock in that concern to Mr. W. F. Uarri- son, a St. John merchant, accepting the latter'a note therefor. The note was de- posited in the Bank of Nova Scotia, and when the time expired for payment Mr. Harrison refused to meet it, alleging Mr. Sterling waa aware of the rottenness of the Maritime Bank when he sold the shares. The trial of the case has resulted in a thorough oxpoaure of the loose methods adopted by the bank management, and aome of the evidence elicited gives rise to the auspi- cion that MacLellankeepstwoseta of certain books BO as to hide the true state of the bank affairs from the directors. Mr. Sterling aweara that although he was a director and attended a meeting at the bank on July iitth, 1880, he did not know that U. -V. Jc J. Stewart had then drawn exchange on Stewart Bros., London, to the extent of over ilO.OOO. The bulk of this exchange waa without an endorser. Neither did he know that MacLellan, the manager of the bank, had surrendered 87.j,O0O worth of Guy, Bevan & Co.'s aecuritiea and accepted iuatead certificates of stock in the Trading Company to the extent of ilS.OOO. It has also been shown in evidence that although the Trading Company had a large amount to its credit in the bank when it failed, the bulk of it came from the Stewart Exchange and waa retlly thd bank's own money. Mr. J. F. McMillan, one of the li(iuida- tor's clerks, swore to-day that the deficiency of the bank, after deducting the value of aaaets, was over $1,300,000. The liquida- tors had realized nothing from Stewart or from Guy, Bevan & Co.' I'rom George McLeod, who owed Slt;8,000 when the bank closed, they had got 84,000 and a promise of a little more. The revelations are not calculated to in- spire much hope in the breasts of notehold- ers. MacLellan, who is largely responsible for the craah, ia said to be operating in real estate in Omaha. Bid of Her Sammary 3Ianaer of QettlDg; a Drunkeo Husband. A Carthage, HI., despatch aays : At Fountain Green, twelve miles east of Carthago, Mrs. Ida M. Wright, the young bride of Silas M. Wright, was found hang- ing in the smoke-house yesterday evening by her huaband, who had been absent from home since Monday. The deed waa com- mitted on Tuesday. Upon discovering the body the horrified husband fainted away and lay in a stupor for several hours. The body was cut down by neighbors and the following letter was found on her person : Dkak HiBiiA-M).â€" It la my pleasure that I write those few liiiua. 1 am aa Imi^iy as can l<e. and I hoiio you are the same. I am Koing to hang uiy- solf to-d(iy and I know you will be happy. I wouldn't leave you, but I never could bo hiiipy. llury me in uiywedcling clothes. I hope you will j amp and sing for joy when you Bee me hi by the neck. This is Tuesday morning, j I) M uiy iroublen shall be ended la this world, wish you all the joy iu thia world, for I am as happy as can lie t haven't cried or shed a tear since you loft, for 1 was too hapiiy to cry. I am ciiiug to dio believing in the Lord. I will bo happier than to live with a drunkard.â€" Your wife. Ida M. Wiugut. Wright had come home drunk on one or two occaaions and hia conduct drove the woman to suicide. angmg At » or 1 " Truth â- â-  on tlio Kmperur Frederick. A London cable says : Mr. Labouchere aaya : It ia scarcely to be wondered at, but ia none the leas to bo regretted, that the present interlude in the Charlottenburg tragedy should once more be giving hot>CB for which there is unfortunately not a shade of foundation. It may be true that I'rof. Virchow has found no cancerous elements in the matters which be lately examined. But this negative evidence proves nothing whatever in Buoh a case. The atatemcnl that the learned profeasor has now given a positively favorable opinion ia simply incredible, except on the auppo- aition that his brain has umlergono some kind of sympathetic muniraification during his recent exploits as an archwological resurrectionist in Egypt. Another state- ment which was made not long ago with some pretence of authority, waa that the diseaaa from which the German Emperor is Buffering is now believed to bo con sumption of the throat, which is abeolutoly idioin:. Certain other theories of amateur diagnoaticians which have been widely cur rent io a lollo trnce kind of way, and which need not be more particularly referr cd to, aro equally gronndleaa. The truth ia that there has been little or no doubt all along among the doctors aa to the nature of the disease. But as by the rrusaian Con- atitution no one Buffering from a malady declared to be incurable can aacend the throne, it was necessary tor them to dia- sembla. A Model MlulBUr. liev. Dr. Rainaford, rector of St. George'a Church, New i'ork, is six feet tall, stal- wart, healthy and fearless. Ho aays what he meana and means what be says, even though he hurts the millionaire and " miser- able sinner " (riJs " the General Confes slon " in the I'rayer Book), J. Pierpont Morgan. Uis people have just completed a church building for use of various depart ments â€" schools, workingmen's guilds, St. .\ndrew'a Brotherhood, etc. â€" which, like the barna of Tennsylvania farmers, ia bigger than the church itself. On Sunday evenings the working people are in a majority of the congregation (which is always full), though the magnificent eccles iaatical structure stands on Btnyveaant square. Laat Sunday Dr. Kainaford took the breath away from some of his people by saying that as bia wealthy parishioners were about to go away for the summer, he would be glad if tbey would allow his poor and needy parishioners to live in their vacant houses. Ho guaranteed that their premises would be well cared for, and said he would be personally responaible for the conduct of Buch families as bo might fur- nish the names for occupancy. Whether there has been any general response as yet no one knows, but the experiment ia a bold one, and the result will be watched with interest. So far each is waiting to aee what hia neighbor will do about it. â€" Kx. « A Uuaband Stubbed and Wife luaulted A Windsor despatch says : At Comber, Essex county, on Thursday afternoon, Mr. and Mrs. Adam Fenncr went to the post- office. Mrs. I'enner was there accosted by a man unknown to her who insisted on going home with her. When the fellow saw Mr. Fenncr approaching ho moved on, but kept only a few feet in advance, and when olr. Fcuncr approached the man turned arouOdv drew a knife and told him to clear out, at the same time trying to stab him with the knife. The two clinohed and a acnflle ensued. Mr. Fenner had his right hand broken and received a stab on the back of the head and one on the shoulder, besides other smaller cuts. The back of his coat and collar were pierced thirteen times with the knife. The rullian succeeded in getting away and ran across the fields, leaving his hat behind. Constable Lind- say, from the description given by Mra. I'enner, arreated Louis Dove, an employee of Ainslie'a mill. Mrs. Fenuer identified him aa the man and he waa remanded ta Sandwich for trial. Mr. Fenner is danger- ously wounded. KxtrnorilltiHry I.ohh of a HiihIihihI A Montreal deBpatuh aaya : Mrs. James Elliott, of Three Uivers, and lately of Waterbury, N.II., reported at the (Central station this morning that whilst passing through horo on her way to Three Uivers she lost her huaband in Bt. Dnininiquo street in a moat extraordinary manner. It appears that he was foreman for Moasrs. ifall, Noilaon .\; Co., lumber merolianta, of Throe Uivers, for .'lU years. Wishing to retire from work he moved to Waterbury but there became weak- minded, and do- aired to go back to hia place of birth. On arriving here he deairod to seu some rela- tives in St. Catharine street, but on the way up St. Dominique street ho felt weak and sat down on a doorstep. Hia wife walked on a few stepa, and when she turned to look for hira he had iiisappaare<l. Think- ing that perhaps ho had gone to Three nivera she went there, but failed to find him and returned. A Real Aeri>llle Captured. A Clovoland, Ohio, despatch saya : Aa Mr. I. N. MoMuUen waa aiijoying his veai^r smoke laat evening in his houao yard on fleelyo avenue, hia attention was arrested by a blazing object in the sky shooting his way. He called to hia wife to step out and see it, and as she rospondod to the call an aerolite imbedded itaelf in the gronnd within ten feet of where ho stood. When it struck, the mass of tiro resolved itaelf into a ball as large as a football and burned for a few seconds. The atmosphere was filled with a strong sulphnroua odor. For a moment Mr. McMullon was struck dumb with ama/.o- mont and terror, but on recovering ho hastened to the apot where the mass had fallen. Ho found a hole in the ground from which a considerable amount of heat issued. Iteaolved at all hazards to find out what had entered the ground, he pro- cured a light, and seizing a small hntcnot, dug down for a distance of two feet, when ho found a subatance about aa largo as a small apple too hot to handle. Ho throw it out on tbo ground to cool, which took about half an hour. After being snflioiently cooled to handle he took it into the house and proceeded to examine it. It ia a half sphere in shape, woigha about 12 ounces, and has the appearance of being copper coated with a thin black substance. It ia so hard that a sharp knife will not cut it. Clever Kxpuiure oC Splrltiiallatlc Tricka Hermann, the necromancer, entertained a large audience at the Academy of Muaic, New York, the other evening, by exposing the tricka of thespiritualiata' trade. Among other thiuga he disclosed the secret of apook painting by spiritual agency, aa {ht formed so successfully by Mmo. Diss Debar. Canvasses were .shown to the audience to be perfectiv blank -, then a committee of one waa aeleoted to hold it above hia head with his back to the audience. Thu I'ro- fesaor passed hia hands several times over the canvass, adroitly removing a ahoet of paper pasted over it, turned it round to the audience, and there was a picture. One of these was actually one of those taken away from the studio at Lawyer Marsh's " lemplc." Dr. Lawrence, late the asso- ciate of the Diss Debar, examined it and said the paint was not wot, as though it had been recently done. Prof. Hermann admitted that the gentleman might know more about how the fraud waa committed than he did. " I only know," he added, raiaing hia voice, " that aome peraon in New York has been defrauded of more than $100,000 by juat aiich a trick aa thia." "It ia pretty blue up at the house," said Mr. Twiney, mournfully ; "I have got a cold, my wife's got a ixdd, baby's got the measles, and my eldest daughter's got a piano. Whioh ia the warmest park to sleep in?" IiiKcrHoirt Reply tu Gladstone, A New York despatch saya : The Z/cruM prints advance extracts from Col. Knbort IngersoU's article in the forthcoming Smllt .Imi'riciin Itciiew in reply to Mr. Glad- stone's defence of Christianity. Col. Inger- aoll opens his article with a courteous oomplunenl to Mr. Oladbtono, saying : " Moat men are chilled and narrowed by the snows of age ; their thoughts are darkened by the approach of night. But yon, fur many years, have hastened toward the light, and your mind has been an ' autninii that grow the more by reaping.' " Tho article ia a bold declaration in advo- cacy of freedom of thought and rejection of superstition. * " Why are yon like a crazy man, my dear 7" asked a wife, seating heisolf beaide her huaband. " Don't know," replied the husband, "I give it up." "Why," re^ilied the wife, hitching close up to him, and putting on one of her aweeteet smiles, " I am your other self, and yon are beaide yourself." A SuKgentlou to Ticklish Subjeets. A oorrospondont in "Science' ' writes aa fol- lows : I was a very ticklish youngster, and my comrades aomotinies used that weak- ness for their own amusement. One boy used to show how little offoot tickling had upon him ; but one hot summer day, as he was lying reading, I tickled him on the ribs, and ho almoat wont into convulaiona. I found that he was far more sensitive than any boy in the company, and he revealed hia secret to me under condition of my never tolling any one else. By holding hia breath hn became pachydermatous, and would let anybody tickle him as tnuuli aa they pleased ; but of course they alwaya gave it up at once when they saw hia atolid look. I tried the plan, and it worked ad- mirably 1 and it is my only protection, oven unto thia day, for my outioule is aa sensa- tive as over. The deduction is simple : a man holds hia breath and tho tickler ia ballled. WHAT A BLIND MAK CAN DO. He Can Rnn a Store Without Help and 'Without Making; aUUtake. While in the employ of the New Jersey Bonthem Railroad, afew years ago, Charles H. Fennimore, of Farmiugdale, had the misfortune to lose the Bight of one eye, the result of getting a hot cinder from the locomotive in it. About a year afterward, while working in a marl pit at Lower Squanknm, he got a small pebble in the other eye. He was taken to an infirmary in New York, where every effort was made to save the sight, but he finally became totally blind. Kevolving in hia mind various projects for the support of his family, he deter- mined to try keeping a country store. Hia friends endeavored to dissuade him from the undertaking, but he was resolute and opened a small store in Lower Bqaankum, three miles from Farming- dale. He soon showed an aptitude for the bosiness, and accomplished things which seemed marvelloua. Hia dwelling house is over a mile distant from hia store. At first his little daughter regularly took him by the hand at morning and evening and conducted him to and from hia occu- pation. A little later he said he could go alone, and has done so ever since. His method is to count the steps from the front of hia house to his store, and he has ex- perienced no dilliculty in reaching both in safety. Ue locks and unlocks the door and opens and closes the shutters without as- sistance. His Bon sweeps out and dusts the store, but he expects soon to do this without assistance. His sense of touch and memory are simply wonderful. Every sort of goods put up in packages is ao ar- ranged under bia direction that he can deal out anything in his stock that is called for. Thia he does by cotmting the steps from either end of tho counter, and the number of shelves, beginning with num- ber one at the bottom, and enumerating dividing spaces from either end of the rows of shelving. He weighs accurately any- thing from a i|uarter of a pound of tea to 2ij pounds of tioor, being guided by touch in arranging the weights and the tipping of the scales. His memory of voices is so sensitive that he has never been known to make a mistake in a person's name. As a text a stranger to him was sent to the store. Ue was a fair mimic, and endeavored to personate a man well known to Mr. Fenni- more. Ho signally failed, the blind store- keeper interrupted him atonce and saying : " I don't know who you are, but you are not George Brower." Ferhapa Mr. Fennimore's greatest evi- dence of an unfaltering and accurate memory ia the facility with which he makes change. Every morning Mrs. Fennimore arranges his wallet for him. The S5 notes are placed in the bottom, and $'J notes in the middle, and the $1 notes on the to^ of the package. He alwaya knows to a penny how much change he has in an ordinary shot bag, and can tell the instant he touches an^ piece the value it represents. Thus e<|uipped, he is ready to give a customer change for a note or silver currency, and hia accuracy in making change e<inals that of any merchant in all the country round. Tried one day with a 85 gold piece, whioh was placed in his hand, he looked toward tb« owner as if he could see him, smiled, rang the coin upon the counter, and said : " This ia a io gold piece ; what do you wish to buy ?" Ue is an expert at addition and subtraction, readily keeping in his mind a dozen articles and their price, and telling the customer the amoant the moment tho last article ia served. He is pleased with his occupation, and has made his business a modest 8UC<ess.â€" >'< w i or/; .S'lKl. Deep HreathlnK- (By William Ulaiiae.) Nobody teaches American boys bow to breathe. City boys, and many from the country, too, have finer chests before they go to school than they over do afterward. Bitting in a school room, or shop, or fac- tory, or any other room five or six hours a day, and then sitting most of tho rest of the day besides, does much to weaken the chest, for when you ait still you do not breathe your lungs half full. Take one large full breath now, and see how your chest rises and expands, and how differ- ently from a minute ago, when breathing only as you generally do. Many boys actually do not breathe their lungs full onoe in a whole week. Is it any wonder they have weak chests, and that they easily catch cold '.' How are you to have strong lungs if you do not use them I Which has the strong armsâ€" the invalid leaving a sick bed or the blacksmith ? he who uses hia arms or he who does not ? When walking at the rate of four miles an hour, you breathe nearly five times as much air as when yuu are sitting still. Now the fuller breaths you take, and the more of them you take in a day, the stronger and fuller cheat you are going to have. If every boy in the United States would take a thousand alow, very deep breaths every day from now on throughout bia life, it would almost double our vigor and effectiveness as a nation. F'or di^ep breathing not only enlarges the chest itself, and makes it shapely and strong, but it gives power and vigor to the lungs and heart, and makes them do their work far better. And it does the same to tho stomach and bowels, the liver and kidneys -, indeed, to all the vital organs. It makes the blood richer. It adds directly to the vigor of the brain as well, ami so enables it to do more work. In short, it ia about the best known way of getting and keeping health. And who would oare to hire a sick man to work for him V Or who can do much hard work when he is sick ? Not that we can always avoid siokneas, but it ialess likely to come, and has harder work to outer, when we are robust and in good training than when we are weak and run down. â€" Harpir't Young People. THK POOR IV CHINA. Moat of Them Live on Viva Cents a Day- Cheap Food and Uttle of It. In America, when the laboring man and hia family cannot afford to eat meat twice ^ each day, they are aopposed to be in a con- dition of destitution. Y'^et the Chineae laborer, getting what he calls good wagea, does not eat a pound of meat in a month, although meat is as cheap in China aa in America. His daily food consists of rice steamed, cabbage boiled in a great deal of water, and as a relish, raw turnip pickled, bat in a strong brine, of which he has only two or three bits the size of dice. When he wishes to be very extravagant, and ia reckless of expense, he buys a cash worth of the dried seeds of the watermelon, and munches them as a desert. lu sum- mer he eats cucumbers raw, skin, prickles, and all, or melons, not wasting the rind, or, it may be, a raw carrot or turnip. His clothing ia aa simple aa his diet. In the summer it consiata of shoes and stockings, both made of cotton cloth, and a pair of trousers, without lining, of the same material. He has also a sort of shirt worn outBide the trousers, but thia he wears only on state occaaiona. For spring and antuma he weara, if he can afford it, garments of the same material lined. In the winter, in a climate like New York or Philadelphia, his trousers are wadded and his upper gar- ment is either also wadded or ia a sheep- skin tanned with the wool on and worn with the wool next hia skin. He scorns underclothing of every sort. One suit answers for day and night, since he sleeps in the same clothes in which he works. Hence he ia not troubled with much baggage when he goes on a journey. Three dollars would probably buy the en- tire summer wardrobe of what may be called a comfortably poor Chinaman â€" that is, one at work on steady wages â€" while twenty-five or thirty cents would be more than sufficient to purchase all the rags â€" and he wears nothing else â€" of the very poor. In the winter he always pawns his summer clothes and in the same way ea- trusts his winter clothing as soon aa warm weather comes to the keeping of his " uncle." His house is built of either aun- dried or " broken " brick laid in mud, has never any other than a brick, or, more commonly, a mud tloor, windows of paper, and a door sufficiently open for all purposes of ventilation. For a family of five or six persons there is seldom, if ever, more than one room. The entire furniture consists of a table, a ricketty stool or two, and a raised platform of brick covered with a coarse mat of reeds, which serves as a bed. The house has no chimney and no fire is used, winter or sum- mer, except the small amount needed for the family cooking. The character of the food consumed insuch a family has already been described, but something ought to be said as to its coat. It is a very cominon picture in I'ekin or any other city in China to aee a little boy or girl going with a few cash and two or three rude and cheap dishes to purchasa the materials for an evening meal, and tho average cost of such a meal as has been described, for one person, is certainly not more than two cents of our money. I am convinced by many years' residence among the Chinese and careful study of their habits and life that probably two-thirds of the entire population, or say 200,000,000 of the people, live on a food consumption not exceeding Sl.iO of our money a month, or say five cents a day. â€" Youths' Companion. " IronlnB" for Neuralgic I'ltlua. Neuralgic pains are a common atlliotion of humanity, and not a few people would be glad to know that one of the speediest sources of temporary relief is to heat a llatiron, put a double fold of flannel on the painful part and then move tho iron gently to and fro on the tiannela. " Iron " the painful part thua for a few minutes and the suffering will almost certainly cease. The Emperor of Brazil continuee to im- prove, and it is propoaed to remove him to Aix'lea- Bains next Thursday. A Matter uf ItusiueM. Judge â€" It appears from the evidence that you swindled this mau out of 9'i3.30. Prisonerâ€" I admit it. Your Honor, but 1 beg to call Your Honor's attention to the fact that it was simply in the way of busi- ness. Judgeâ€" In the way of businoBS '.' Prisoner â€" Yes, Your Honor. We have formed a Swindling Trust. Judge â€" A Swindling Trust .' Prisoner â€" Yes, Your Honor. I will ex- plain to you. Formerly we used to swindle a man out of S500. Now we swindle ten men out of ?50 a piece. Our ^irofits are the same, but we relieve tho individual and dis- tribute the burden, putting it lightly upon the shoulders of tea instead of heavily upon one. Judge â€" I perceive. Prisonerâ€" So, you sec, by forming » Swindling Trust wo are really benefactors of our fellowman ; the many come to the rescue of the one. It ia harder work, of course, to find ten men with ?50 than one with 9600, but we have the satisfaction of knowing that we have put the burden of the one upon the many. Moreover, wo have broken up all other combinations of swindlers and the community is safe from every one excepting ourselves. I therefore ask Your Honor to look upon the matter in a business light. We are a trust, and aa such we look not for interference, but pro- tection from the law. Judge â€" Of course, if you call yourselves a trust â€" Prisoner â€" We are, Your Honor. Judge- Organized for the benefit â€" Prisoner â€" Of the individual, Your Honor. Judge â€" Yes, and as you are the indi\idueJ and society is the manyâ€" six mouths in the House of Correction. Mr. Clerk, call the next case. -J(o«toK Courier. A Ducal Dancer. The Duke of Sutherland ia conceded to be the best dancer of the Highland fiing in all Scotland. He recently dined with the Luke of Edinburgh on board the flagship Alexander, at Malta, and after dinner the two dukes danced the " TuUocbgornm " for an hour, to the delight of the officers and ship's company. The l>ukc of Suther- land's piper furnished the music. " I'll do the best I can, sir," said the new convert humbly to the good pastor, " but you mustn't expect too much of mo at first ; I've been an auctioneer for the last twelve years."â€" Chicago Tribunt. A Vigorous Warning. " In Hamilton, Canada," remarks a United States contemporary, "the other day a man was sent to prison for a > ear for stealing an umbrella, and a careful investi- gation convinces us that it wasn't much of an umbrella either. It behooves the news- papers of this country to raise a tremen- dous cry of warning. It would be the hardest kind of luck if some of our bright. enterpriBing American citizens should get out of this country with a couple of hundred thousand dollars of other people's money with their usual success only to find them- selves pining away in an ill-smelling Canada priaon at "last for stealing an umbrella 1 Sound the alarm at once ! King the fire bells, if necessary. ^ â€" â€" King Oscar, of Sweden, recently called on the Pope, and instead of kissing hia hand, aa is tno ouatooi, kiaaed him soundly on both cheeks, to the surprise of the courtiers. It waa tho greatest ahock the traditions of tho Vatican had received aince General Grant shook hands with Piua IX., and said: " How do you do, sir?" Dr- J. U. Widdlfleld, of Newmarket, waa yesterday appointed Sheriff of the County of York. i\ K\