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Page 5; News, 'Tuesday, October:9, 1990 Warning to house buyers Given the current condition of the Canadian economy variously described as a mild recession or the end of western economics, many of you are considering buy- ing a house. Many of you are probably considering suicide, but wait, there is a better way - buy a house. In a depressed market, this is a very shtewd move. You'll recall that in the last Great Depression, the smart businessmen put all their money in bargain real estate deals and soon after they starved to death, the depression ended and their children became rich beyond their dreams. A long time ago, when people used to buy houses to (sit down for this one!) live in them, I too became a homeowner. Purchasing my very first and very own house was a rewarding William J. Thomas experience that I'll never forget because it got me out of the cramped one-bedroom apartment where my wife and four cats were still residing. Ha, ha, ha, just kidding. In the real estate business this is known as "trading up" humor. But purchasing a house is seri- ous business and real estate now, \is a buyer's market. The price of houses today is such that even in the city of Toronto, the average family of four with a combined annual income of $62,500 can now afford to ride up to Rosedale on the TTC and gaze at one long- ingly. Here's a step-by-step guide to house buying that can make you as happy a homeowner as I am today. 3 Step 1: ADVERTISING: Do not be misled by classified ads. For instance: "White?Bi?M. Specializing in S & M" is not a white, two-level, modestly priced house with security system and mote. If however you are a White?Bi.?F./ that likes. soft Corinthian leather, you could respond to such an ad with the idea of housesharing in mind. Step 2: AREA SELECTION: A wise home hunter will always call the local planning office to make sure the region in which he is considering residing in is not. 4 a) an area that is planning to secede from Canada b) an area planning to stay in Canada with some serious reser- vations c) areservation. : Step 3: CREATIVE FINANC- ING: Forgetting for a moment you're not actually the person whose name is on the cheques you're signing can get you play- ing the real estate game with, as they like to say, other people's money. Step 4: BAD ADVICE: Do not succumb to the advice of an unscrupulous third party with a vested interest in your financial downfall. In other words, do the deal while your brother-in-law is off on holidays. Step 5: AN AGENT: A better working relationship can be established with a real estate agent if you keep in mind agents are: a) people who secretly want to be lawyers. b) people who would do the job for nothing just to get their picture in the paper. c) people who admire Donald Trump. continued on page 7 It's that time of year again - the fall season. The, 'bang, fall- down-your're-dead' season' as once more the sounds of legalised mayhem are heard-in the land, and the mighty white hunter is once more upon the war-path against anything flying or fleeing. Or even standing still in an open field, munching its cud and look- ing very bovine. These latter are called 'cow', but to the myopic M.W.M., they _ are apparently easily mistaken for a moose or a'deer. Painting the letters, C:O.W., in white paint on the sides of these domesticated animals by some desperate farm- ers, is of no use whatsoever. Mighty white hunters are unable to read. They are also unable to shoot expertly and correctly, as witness the vast numbers of wounded ani- mals left to die slow and painful deaths, and the great numbers of other M.W.H.'s who are mistak- enly shot by their companions. Maybe not even so mistakenly in some instances, perhaps? What a Olga Landiak The mighty white hunter great way to commit the perfect crime. "Excuse me, Your Honour, but I thought Tom (Dick or Harry) was a wild animal. He looked just like one." "I tripped over a tree root and my gun went off by accident." "I didn't see Tom (Dick or Harry) coming through the bush. He was making all this noise, so I popped off with a sound shot. I didn't mean to kill him." Oh yeah???? In pioneer days when living off the land and bringing home, not the bacon but the wild birds and animals, was an absolute necessity, hunting had its reason and its place. Today? Where is the dire need to so provide for the table when the super-markets abound, and most pay, or welfare, cheques are more than adequate to keep a body. from completely RTD starving. Most of us eat too much anyway. Today's hunting is just an excuse on the part of some men to exercise a wierd kind of maleness called 'macho-ism', and to perpet- uate an atavistic lust for killing. They can't go around killing their fellow men (though, lord knows, the crime statistics show they try hard enough), so they pick up their guns, purchase their licences, and take off after the wild critters and birds of the plan- et. Maybe some people, male and female, red or white, get a kick out of asserting their human supe- riority over the creatures in this way but, without the justifiable -- excuse of protection from attack or providing for a 'starving' fami- ly, it seems to be a pretty lop- sided affair. The advantage is all on the side of the humans whose greed for one stupid reason or another (trophy heads, aphrodisi- acs, plumage, skins, artifacts, etc.) has lead to the extinction or near-extinction of birds and ani- mals around the world. Something to be proud of? Hardly. Especially in this day and age of supposed concern for the van- ishing species. If people are going to put their money where their flapping mouths are, then why aren't they going after the governments who are issuing these hunting licences in the first place? I'll tell you why not. Because it is an extremely lucra- tive form of tax revenue. Not to mention the additional tax gar- nered through the sale of all that expensive hunting equipment. ' Give up such a'good thing? Not the pols with their tax-fat salaries and pensions, I can tell you. Which leaves it up to the indi- vidual - to hunt or not to hunt. For absolute necessity's sake, per- haps, but is anybody really that hard up in socialist Canada with all its social programmes in place? Even our dear aboriginals with their special hunting and fishing privileges? I very much doubt it. There are other ways of putting extra food on the table, ways which take a helluva lot more sweat and toil than hoisting a rifle to the shoulder. Maybe - some people, these mighty white hunters, should give it a try. And the mighty 'red' ones, too. Premier It was an emotional moment. Bob Rae, Canada's first Baby Boom generation premier, stood at the podium before 2,000 peo- ple at Convocation Hall at the University of Toronto in the glare of television lights. As he looked down at the paper with his oath of office on it, the serious expression on his face seemed to say "this is it - I'm not dreaming." Then, after this moment of solemn expression, Rae's face went back to his famous boyish grin, as he acknowledged the standing ova- tion from the audience. Then, one by one, the new ministers took their turn at the podium. For northern Ontario, the new cabinet represents the strongest voice we've ever had: six northern ministers - two from the northeast, and four from the northwest. Floyd Laughren, from Nickel Belt, assumes the second most powerful job in government - Deputy Premier and Treasurer. Laughren (called "Pink Floyd" by caucus colleagues and NDP staffers) will have the daunting task of implementing the NDP's NORTHERN INSIGHTS | Bob's challenge massive program of tax reform, and trying to find the dollars to implement the other NDP cam- paign promises with a shrinking economy. Shelley Martel, the youngest member ever to be elected to the Legislature five years ago, is now the Minister of Northern Development. She also has the job of Government House Leader,-which means she is in charge of getting the NDP agenda through the Legislature. In the northwest, Bud Wildman from the Algoma riding takes on the double jeopardy position of Minister of Natural Resources, and Minister Responsible for Native Affairs. Wildman, in conjunction with the by Larry Sanders Canadian Paperworkers Union, wrote the NDP forest policy years ago - which calls for the phasing out of the Forest Management Agreements with the large forest companies, the abolition of clear cut logging practices, and turning the management system upside down to.put control of timber management in the hands of local forest authorities - governed by representative community boards. In addition, Wildman has the daunting task of carrying out Rae's campaign promise, repeated in his inaugural address as Premier, to "implement self-gov- Gilles Pouliot, from Lake Nipigon riding, takes on Mines and Francophone Affairs. I'm not expecting many changes on the mining front, since the Liberals already overhauled the ancient Mining Act-last year, and Pouliot spoke in favour of the bill when it went through the Legislature. Instead, I expect Pouliot to con- centrate on his Francophone port- folio - and to spend a lot of time meeting with municipalities who passed "English-only" resolutions on the grounds that Queen's Park doesn't consult the lower levels of © government. The NDP is com- test, as he tries to rectify years of bitterness in city and town halls. The NDP criticized previous gov- ernments often for doing what the municipalities and school boards hate the most-shoving programs on lower levels of government without compensation. Howard Hampton, from Rainy River, takes on the Attorney- General's post - commonly thought of as the third most important job in government, after Rae and Laughren. Hampton has developed a reputa- tion for being a strong constituen- cy person. Hampton admits he's not sure he will be able to still do that, while dealing with such chestnuts as Sunday Shopping, court challenges to Ottawa's GST and the Senate appointments, and legal reforms affecting native people. . The surprise northern appoint- ment was that of Shelley Wark- Martyn, from Port Arthur, as Minister of Revenue. Everyone, ernment agreements with mitted to improving consultation including Wark-Martyn, was Ontario's native people, in our With municipalities, and Pouliot's éxpecting an appointment as a first term of office." . diplomatic skills will be put to the continued on page 8 SER Me ie BTA LE Tek BEEP Pla Pi EE