Back in the Corner eT e : by Greg Huneault I woke up in a panic during one endless night last week. I thought I would have to return to school. It's not that school of and by itself bothers me, but events came back to me in stark reality. One tends to shellac or smooth CS See i Back in the Corner 1 Contest still on! t I This is the last week we I will accept entries for the J first Back in the Corner j Contest! | Readers were invited to J Isubmit the name of a per- I Ison whose name reflected ! ! his/her job, hobby, char-! j acter trait, or interesting , j angle. I | Examples included Joe] I Tees, who won Low Net! lat the Hanley Memorial! j Golf Tournament, and Bill 1 j Mills, who is the Milly | Superintendent at Minno- j Iva. I I Submissions will be judged I I on the interesting way you pre- I I sent your choice, so that if two I I entries have the same name, the I I more interesting one will win. [your name i phone number J I i your choice I i I i 1 I 5 a I I 1 I I reason J I | 1 } I ] I 5 1 I I I The Winner will receive 5 lottery tickets! De ce cee cee es ene er es oe wl BARKER - Mrs. Mary Kathleen Barker aged 79 years of Terrace Bay passed away in hospital on August 30, 1988. She was born in Toronto in 1908 and moved to Geraldton in 1939. She then moved to Lindsay in 1980 and Terrace Bay in 1987. Member of Geraldton Duplicate Bridge Club and St. Theresa's Parish for many years. Sadly missed by sons Paul and wife Helen of Ottawa, John Peter of Thunder Bay, daughters Patricia and hus- band Norman Smith of Peterborough and Kathleen and husband Raimo Mikkonen of Terrace Bay. Grandchildren Liz, Danny, David, Phillip, Paul and Maureen. Predeceased by her husband Cyril and grandson Kevin. If friends so desire memo- rials to the Heart and Stroke Foundation would be appreciated out memories with each passing year, until a point is reached where almost everything looks happy and carefree. For some, it even happens to their school memories. How many of us know older people who had to walk to school with nothing on their bare feet but scratches and old gum that they happened to step on? Did your father walk three miles to and from school, and uphill both ways, too? School is no longer the place where, by the simple act of mechanical repetition, one learns the capital city of every country in the world. It has become a place where students learn about AIDS and other sexual diseases, a place where -- in the larger urban cen- tres at least -- proper gun han- dling and firearm control could almost become a subject to be studied. A friend of mine visited Terrace Bay about two weeks ago. She teaches French to ele- mentary school students around Barrie. I'm certain she has had military training. She said she has heard stories of 12- and 13-year-old kids in Toronto coming to school with handguns -- never mind common place drugs. I think the role 'school' plays in the overall development of a child has changed drastically in the last few decades. But some things remain con- stant. Do you remember the class clown, the school bully, the young goddess in Grade 5 who couldn't even be bothered with any sports jock unless he had at least the tracings of a peach-skin moustache? The guys in Grade 8 were usu- ally the Chosen Ones, although I did know this guy named Carlo who had a full-blown mustache by Grade 6. He was the envy of all the guys until about Grade 12, by which time he had no hair left on the top of his head. (Nature has a great way of balancing her bud- get, I guéss.) Another constant was the ten- sion and fear of writing essays by a certain deadline. Everyone who attended school can remember, if they tried hard enough, the pressure associated with writing an essay on some subject whether it was for English or History. I hated that stuff; I really did. Now it is my job. Parents, please try to under- stand your children when they are Sitting at the kitchen table with books and encyclopedias open, munching on crackers as if one of them might contain instantaneous inspiration that will help your child to write a 1,000 word essay in ten minutes. I know what they are going through. I guess, though, that the pres- sure can help to develop and mould them. After all, they'll have to start paying bills, taxes, etc. by certain deadlines, and uphill both ways, too. Come to think of it, maybe school hasn't changed that much after all. Best of luck to all the students this year, and take it one essay at time! Wedding Announcement Mr. & Mrs. Michael Reid are pleased to announce the forthcoming wedding of their son Jeffrey Michael Pamela Mcintyre daughter of Mrs. Catherine McIntyre of Winnipeg, Manitoba. The wedding took place September 3, 1988 at Augustine United Church Winnipeg, Manitoba Page 5, News, Wednesday, September 7 , 1988 Beware of a new kind of dog! "T avoid mass distribution reli- giously." Pardon the pun, but you may be wondering what hap- pened to the News this week. In an effort to show those who *may not have read the News at all or lately what they may have been missing, we've mailed this week's issue to every post office box in the area. "Every post office box," local Canada Post employees yelled in horror. Yep. It is our belief that those who have- not read the News will see the benefits of reading their own newspaper, which covers issues in their own community. It is our belief, also, that Russian and U.S. military forces will throw down their weapons and book getaway vacations somewhere in the Bahamas. Hey, some things are easier to 'do than others. Getting a subscription to your local newspaper is one of the eas- iest things you can do for you and your family, or perhaps for a friend. Hoping your friend will buy you a getaway trip to the Bahamas might be a different story. I can't hold in my pride any longer. Forgive me, but I have to share my scientific discovery with someone. I have discovered a subspecies of dog actually quite common in this area! I know; it sounds like I'm barking up the_wrong tree, but look around. I just can't under- stand. why others before me haven't discovered this unique "dog" (for lack of a more appro- priate name). This subspecies of dog -- I've called it Canis Northshorus -- has developed an incredible abili- ty; my guess is because its ances- tors had to slowly learn the skills that their offspring are now born with. Based on my crude scientific studies (using a ruler, a chain and lots of dog biscuits), it appears Canis Northshorus can somehow bolt or attach itself to the box of a pickup truck. Look around! How many times have you seen a dog riding in the back of a speeding truck and simply dismissed it as a well- trained hunting dog? They'll fool you like that because that's how they have evolved. And they are all over, too. Speeding along Manitoba Street in Schreiber while safely clamped into the back of a '78 G.M. They'll suddenly pop up from an '81 Ford while it's parked in front of Simcoe Plaza. It seems they have also devel- oped the uncanny ability to mimic the appearance and man- nerisms of other types of dogs. Be careful; what might look like a simple, vicious German Shepard or husky, crazed Lab in the back of someone's truck could actually turn out to be a Canis Northshorus. I will begin directing my ener- gy toward studying those who own a Canis Northshorus. Wish me good luck. Schreiber Curling Club Notice To Potential Curlers in the Schreiber Area. General meeting on Thursday, September 8, 1988 at 7:30 p.m. in the Curling Club Lounge. For more information call J. Redins 824-2848 Everyone is Welcome The Corporation of the Township of Terrace Bay Township of Terrace Bay Unorganized Locality of Jackfish 1988 Municipal/School Board Elections Candidate Registration Prospective Candidates for all elected offices must file a Notice of Registration with the municipal clerk on or before Nomination Day, October 17, 1988. <A candidate may not raise funds or incur campaign expenses unless he or she has first registered as a candidate. Registration forms and additional information may be obtained from the Municipal Office, 12 Simcoe Plaza, Terrace Bay David C. Fulton Clerk and Returning Officer Township of Terrace Bay -- CONFEDERATION COLLEGE Continuing Education Is Now offering a variety of Fall programs in TERRACE BAY & SCHREIBER - Introduction to Accounting; Assertiveness Training; Word Processing; Keyboarding (typing); Microcomputer Applications; Cabinet/Shelf Building; Small Motors... AND MORE!!! For more information, contact: Confederation College - Continuing Education Box 520, Marathon, Ont. POT 2E0 or call 1-800-465-3364