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SUGAR THE AND SPICE Se TT MLS Y Westward the Smileys I've been married for nearly 20 years, all of them to the same dame, and I understand less at this moment about the so-called feminine process of thinking than I did on my wedding day. This admission is a result of the latest turn in our economic waltz with this summer. Before holidays began, we had discussed making a trip to the west coast. Then my wife took inventory of the finances and stated flatly that we couldn't af- ford it, even if we camped all the way and ate at the Salvation Army. I was rather relieved. I love to travel, but I hate traveling with women. They fuss about missing trains. They worry about hotel rooms. They take enough clothes on a week's trip to take them around the world on a cruise. And they constantly put their hair up and take it down. Therefore, I looked forward to a quiet, restful summer. Lots of golf. Plenty of swims. A few fishing jaunts. An occasional ex- cursion to see a play. Then came the refrigerator fiasco, already related here. Net loss of $350. That really put the clincher on our trip to the coast. Then came the call, collect, from Vancouver. The son and' heir informed us casually, but with a tremour, that he didn't think he'd .go back to college. You see, the boat he's working on plies the Pacific to Acapulco, - Mexico, in the winter. And you see, he could get a job on her as a waiter. And you see, he'd be making $10,000 a year, at only 19, which is pretty good, eh? And you see, it would be a great chance to see the world. And you see, he'd be more mature in a year, and besides, would be able to pay for his whole year at school, when he went back. And so on. Well! I've seen his old lady fly off the handle. Many times. But I've never seen her go straight up in the air and re- main suspended there through most of a phone call that cost me eleven bucks. So, logically, we are going to Vancouver. I mean, after all, you only live once. And why shouldn't you take a trip when you're young enough to enjoy it. And what the heck, it's only money, isn't it? And so on. It's nothing to do with seeing Hugh, or dragging him home in chains. Not at all. What ever gave anyone that idea? Why, he's only ashore 10 hours in Vancouver and who'd spend a thousand dollars to fly out there to see him for that length of time? Especially when we sent him out there to save $800 to- ward his college fees. That would be ridiculous,wouldn't it? In fact, insane. Well, with the aid of several federal banks, the fly-now-pay- later plan, and a credit. card some unsuspecting idiot gave me a couple of years ago, we leave tomorrow for a_ holiday that will be about halfpaid for by this time next year. Have you ever noticed that when you take a plunge you can't afford, like this, every- thing else starts to go wrong, as if to compound your folly and rub it in? This week, I got a speeding ticket, first in my life, the vacuum went on the fritz and required expensive repairs, the lock on our back door broke and had to be replaced, I broke a tooth, and our tax notice ar- rived, substantially fatter than last year's. Oh, well, such is life. By the way, if there's no column next week, it will mean we have crashed in the Rockies. And Hugh will be free to go to Mexi- co. After he's paid all those debts at the bank. Which will take him about four years at hard la- bor. NEWS September 8, 1966 Photo by Pouncy - Port Arthur Mr.and Mrs. Pat Falcigno (photo above) were married August 20th in St.Anthony's Roman Catholic Church with Rev. Mario officiating. The bride is the former Miss Phyllis Cusick, daughter of Mrs. Phyllis Cusick, 172 Bruce Street, Port Arthur and the bride- groom's parents are Mr.and Mrs. V.Falcigno, 370 Ambrose Street, Port Arthur. The groom was attended by Joe Greco and the Maid of Honor was Miss Brenda Broad. The couple honeymooned in Montreal and will re- side at 497 Lakeview Drive, Terrace Bay, upon their return. FISH DERBY WINNERS: Winners in the big Fish Derby which was combined with the Annual Festival for the first time this year were:- Lake Trout - Nestor Trach, Rocky Gavin and M.St.Louis; Speckled Trout (O'Keefe Award) - R.Cormier, Mrs. M.Macdonald, R.Gaudet; Pickerel Lyle North, (Marathon), Lloyd Paulsen, Lyle North. Northern Pike - John Ferguson, Henry Hermes, Mrs. Rene Gaudet. Ladies Event - Mrs.H.Hermes, Mrs. J.Beddard, Mrs.L.Paulsen - Junior Event - Ronnie Gaudet, Valerie Larsen, Werner Hermes. Visitor from furthest away - Jerry Cornell, Marathon.