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die didi Made in Canada oy the Makers Jr Xs For a Balanced Diet .. serve Healthful KRAFT CHEESE V-lvecra and Kraft Salad Dressing pg aaa ---- Owl Laffs Sunday-School Teacher--*"And when the prodigal son returned, what hap- pened, Tommy?" Tommy--*"His father ran to meet him and hurt himself severely." Sunday-School Teacher--"Wherever did you get that impression?" Tommy--"It says so right in the Bible--that his father ran to meet him and fell on his neck." Jack--*""Say, Mary, are you going to the party to-night?" Mary--"I'll say I am, Jack! there with bells on!" Jack--"Okay, I'll ring you later." I'll be Hotel Keeper--'"I have rooms for fifty and seventy-five cents a night." Guest--"What's the difference be- tween them?" MOSS GOLD MINES Send for our Special Circular covering this Interesting Speculation F. W. Macdonald & Co. Members Standard Stock & Mining Exchenge Montreal Curb Market 38 King St. W. 159 Craig St. W. TORONTO MONTREAL ELgin 6255-6 MA: 7785-4121 Wire connections to all principal markets Lovely Skin Vegetable Pills Did What Creams Couldn't "I find (writes Miss E. T. Clapham) that Carter's Little Liver Pills will do more to keep the complexion clear and the skin free from blemishes than all the face creams I have used." Dr. Carter's Little Liver Pills are no ordinary laxative. They are ALL VEGETABLE and have a definite, valuable tonic action upon the liver. They end Constipation, Indigestion Biliousness, Headaches, Acidity. All druggists. 25c and 75c red packages. Rh «ihe - PUT HIM OFF HIS PIPE Indigestion and Acidity "A few months azo, I had an attack of indigestion, Lcartburn and acidity, and bad no appetite for meals, especially breakfast. I am a pipe smoker, and for several days I felt so ill I could not even look at my pipe. I decided to try Kruschen Salts. A few days afterwards I found that the heartburn and acidity had gone, and for the last five or six weeks I have been in my usual good health. I can now enjoy my pipe-smoking, and in fyct feel about 10 years younger."--R. P. When your digestive juices fail to flow freely your food lies in the system and ferments, thus causing the distress of indigestion. ' The * little daily dose" of Kruschen first stimulates the flow of the gastric juices, and then ensure | complete, regular and unfailing elimina. tion of all waste matter every day. Hotel Keeper-- "Not much, only the seventy-five-cent ones have rat traps." The teacher was examining the class in physiology. the function of the stomach." Mary--*"The function of the stomach is to hold up the petticoat." Tramp--*"You're equal to any situa- tion, aren't you?" Second Hobo (scornfully)--"Equal? I'm above it!" Wife--"John, is it true that money talks?" : Husband--*"That's what they say, my dear." : Wife--"I wish you'd leave a little here to talk to me during the day. I get so lonely." One reason for so many divorces is that so many fool people insist on get- ting married. A girl sings this defiant refrain: "I'd rather freeze in B V D's than to wear long underwear." We will be better off when the brain in- stead of the pocketbook creates our opinions. Washing clothes can be- ,come dry work. Most of us forget the lucky breaks and remember only the bad ones. A man who makes a lot of money is considered a wonder, and we know a lot of girls who work wonders. It must be terrible to have money to burn and not be able to start a fire. Iden don't mind marrying a flapper-- if she's a pancake flapper. To see a long way behind doesn't require much gray matter. Nurse (going off duty)--"Is there anything else you wish, sir?" Patient--"Yes, kiss me good night." Nurse--"I'l send in an orderly--he does the dirty work." Epitaph of Pneumonia Victim For her on the front door They've rung a wreath; She would wear naught above, | And less beneath. I Wife (to husband, at dinner)--"You won't read that book of etiquette, and now look at you. Here's the desert and all you've got left is a butter spreader." Tommy--*"Ma, do I have to wash my lace again before dinner?" Mother--"Certainly, dear." Tommy--"Aw, gee, why can't I just powder it over again like you do yours?" "Oh, yes," said Mrs. Gadgett, proud- ily, "We can trace our ancestors back to--to--well, I don't know exactly , who, but we've been descending for : centuries." 1 | ! : Harry--'I'm forgetting women." i George--"So am I. I'm for getting a | couple as soon as possible." Ea Dialects A classification of the various dia- lects common to certain regions of the United States is now under pro- aress, it is announced at headquar- cers of the Yale University. Eight hundred questions are t> be asked of representatives of the older and younger generations in all their communities. They will be asked, for 'nstance, whether they call a certain dible a doughnut, a cruller, a fried ake or a fat cake. They will be :sked whether a cherry has a seed. | \ stone or a pit. Does the husband call his partner 'A matrimony "my wife" or "my wo- man," or "the wife" or "the missus"? The dialect dictionary will make a note of it. Is the male parent in a family know as 'father, or pah, or pop, or popper, pappy, dad, daddy," or what not? Is mother ever known "maw," or "mah," or "mommer"? 3 Teacher--"Mary, you tell us, what is | The field workers will obtain »honetic answers. All strata of society will be quizzed. The entire atlas is to have 1,500 maps of Amer can diction. Tha above photograph <"ows Captain R. C. Malin, R.D., R.N.R., whose appointment as Commodore of the Cunard Line has just been announced. (Cunard Photo) On the Mountain She passed like a running flame, He did not see her, but the leaves she touched Were edged with proud fire, And the wind blew haughtily all day Above her track. A deer by a spring looked at him and said: Do you think you can overtake one Who is fleeter than I? And drank and nibbled as if Autumn hand not come With Winter under her apron. The deer knew that high up All the leaves were brown. And the wind whipped them suallenly, And a trail of white ashes lay in the road; But he who was only a man, ran on. --Olive Tilford Dargan, in "Lute and Furrow." MOURNING WARDROBE "A death occurred in our family and I had to go in mourning. I could hard- ly afford to buy all black clothes, so decided to~dye what I had. I consult- ed our druggist and he advised using Diamond Dyes. Everything came out beautifully; coats, wool dresses, stock- ings and all. have since learned to appreciate the excellence of the black Diamond Dyes. I tried another black dye and the results were impossible. I had to get Diamond Dyes and do the work over. Recently I have tinted my curtains a beautiful raspberry shade and dyed a rug a lovely garnet with Diamond Dyes. They are real money savers--the finest dyes money can buy --I truly believe." Mrs. G.K.L., Montreal. a chicker : andsweeter CORN SYRUP The CANADA STARCH CO., Limited MONTREAL LYNG You can get GREATER NOURISHMENT LESS MONEY / Serv "EDWARDSBURG ZL ---- To Ease a Broken Heart I'm putting on my scarlet dress, My flowered hat, too, And if I look a bit bizarre-- Why, what is that to you? Broken hearts and sombre things, Those are all passe, And so are you, and so is he, And so is yesterday. So fasten up my red dress, 1 won't be seen in blue, And if I die to-morrow, Why, what is that to you? --~Carol del R. McMullen, in the Minneapolis Journal. », "e Imaginary Evils Imaginary evils son become real ones by indulging our reflections on them; as he who in a melancholy fancy sees something like a face on the wall or the wainscot, can, by two or three touches with a lead pencil, make it look visible, and agreeing with what he fancied. PIN YOUR CELLAR] WANTED--Persons to grow Mushrooms for us in cellars. upwards of $25 weekly. Tlustrated booklet free. Czradian Mushroom Co, Torento. SPRAINS Rub Minard's in gently. It penetrates sore ligaments, allays inflammation, soothes, heals, Puts you on your feet! 17 HEADACHE Nerves on edge. A head that throbs. You can't stop work, but n a hurry. Aspirin will do it every time. Take a swallow of water, and you're soon comfortable. There's nothing half-way about the action of Aspirin. You will always get complete relief when you take you can stop the pain--in a two or three tablets, these tables. These tablets should be in every shop, office, and home. Ready relieve any sudden ache or pain, from a grumbling tooth to lumbago. Don't suffer with that neuralgia, ASPIRIN 2 B NER oP neuritis, rheumatism, etc.; or lose any time because of colds or sore throat. Get some Aspinn and just follow those proven directions for instant relief. : Aspirin tablets cost very little, especially if you buy them by the bottle. Any doctor will tell you they are harmless. 'They don't hurt the heart. They don't upset the stomach. So take them as often as you have the least need of their quick comfort. Take enough fo complete results. to On sale at dn stores everywhere. Madein Canac (TRADE-MARK REG.) i i | i i | | ! Classified Advertising N OFFER TO EVERY INVENTOR. List of wanted inventions and full A | information sent free. The Ramsay Com= pany, World Patent Attorneys, 273 saok Street, Ottawa, Canada. POULTRY AND EGGS WANTED HIP US YOUR POULTRY AND eggs. Highest market prices paid. Write for quotations. Immediate settle- ment by certified cheque. Crates loaned. Give us a trial. Rosenfeld Poultry and Egg Co. Limited, Montreal. REMNANTS © LBS. PEINTS, SILK OR VELVET, 3 $1.00. A. McCreery Co. Chatham, Ontario. MINK FOR SALE UEBEC MINK--EXTRA DARK, Q almost black when prime, finest stock available, pen-bred, line-bred for years. Order early. Would exchange for few female fishers. Ferguson's Mink Ranch, Charlottetown, Prince Edward Island, Canada. OR SALE--PURE NOVA SCOTIA F mink, My customers won Sweep- stakes and firsts, Chicago, Portland, Stockholm Mink Shows, 1930. Limited number to book. Satisfaction at Nova Scotia's oldest minkery. Brook Mink Farm, West Middle River, Nova Scotia. TAMPED VANITY SET OF UN- S BLEACHED cotton embroidery thread and catalogue of stamped goods, 25c. Lucy Lee Needlework, P.O, Box 1405, Montreal, Que. EALTH, HAPPINESS, SUCCESS. Scientific laws by world famous psychologist. Valuable information free. Write Simpson's, 56 McNairn Ave. To- ronto. Life is only life, when blessed with health.--Martial. Why Suffer with Skin Troubles when Cuticura Quickly Heals Soap 25¢. Ointment 25¢. and 50c. a HOME EMPLOYMENT Hand work--We supply material and instruct. CLARKE (CANADIAN) CO, 170 Bay St, Toronto 3 [ se Suffers So ~Unnecessarily! | early Nervous Prostration O you know her... this poop woman who wakes up, hee eadstillaching,hernervesragged? How many (ouas women are working "on their nerve" because female weakness has robbed them of strength and health? Ifthey would only try Lydia Ea Pinkham's Vegetable Compounds It strengthens by its tonic action .:3 brings soothing, comforting reliefs Get a bottle of the liquid from sour druggist today. Or try it in the new convenient tablet form. VEGETABLE COMPOUND Sh ------ --( ISSUE No. 40--'31